FUTZINGDAY

MONDAY MONDAY

SUNDAY SPLAT

That sound you heard was every ounce of energy I had falling out of me and hitting the pavement.

Phooey.

I had such a fantastic week, but about an hour ago my wheels fell right off and I wanted to sit down on the floor of the breakfast restaurant and bawl my eyes out. We went to Mass, ran a few errands, and stopped to eat, and I swear the fatigue and unwells hit me all at once.

Plus, it's hot as YouKnowWhat here again, so I suspect that this is just another case of the ugly humidities.

My JB is at the pool and I have decided to stay right here in the La-Z-Spinster recliner with the paper, the end of my book, a start on Mary Poppins, and the laundry sploshing for company. Lovie has already announced that he would like to have something light and easy for dinner, so I am off the cooking hook and can just rest and relax for the duration.

I hope your Sunday is lovely and swell, Dearies, and that you get to do whatever your heart desires and your body and soul require! Come tell me all about it!

IN WHICH WE HAVE AN ADVENTURE

I blame it on the Michael's.

They had beach chairs on sale for $15.

Beach chairs.

For $15.

At the Michael's!

They were normally $50 each, but the sign said 70% off and I had my calculator out so fast I broke a sweat all over my SpinsterStitcher big girl t-shirt. I put them in my cart, got the flosses I needed and an 11x11 qsnap set and hit the register.

Then guess what we did?

SATURDAY SWITCH UP

I'm still loving Plum Pudding, but decided to switch it up a bit.

Isn't this swell?! I first laid eyes on this during a StitchCon episode that featured the brag table. I just about jumped out of the d-chair when I did, and think I had it ordered before I knew what hit me. 

This was my very first pdf download, and I have to say...the instant gratification was fantastic.

Here are the details:

Mary Poppins

Designer: Laura Rimola

The Little Stitcher

Website: http://thelittlestitcher.blogspot.com

I have the perfect piece of Colour & Cotton fabric for this, but alas, am short a few of the called for DMC colors. So as soon as I get my wits about me, I'm going to head over to the Michael's and snatch them right up.

So that's my plan for the day, Dearies.  What's new in your world today? Come tell me all about it!

FRIDAY!....WITH ADDED BLISS!

I'm home from the d-chair! Great treatment today! Lower off weight than last Friday! Starbucks! A novel! Happy, happy, joy joy!

I hope you have a wonderful weekend, Dearies! I am going to enjoy my book, have a light dinner and then look forward to nothing but sun, stitching, and good eating! What's on your to-do list for the next few days?

**Dang it, Gumby, I can't figure out how to respond to comments on my own dang blog! Robin asked what I'm reading....it's a novel titled The Editor by Steven Rowley. I pick a stack of books from the New Fiction section or the Just In shelf when I go to the library, and this one caught my eye. Light summer reading and hasn't made my brain hurt so far!

***I do keep a log of books I've read on the GoodReads thing as well as in a very old journal, but I don't know how to tell you to find me...by email address maybe? In that case, it would be under conijorich@aol.com.

EPISODE 75...

I've just cleaned CS2 like an Amish woman on steroids.

(Pause for reaction.)

It all started when I got a good strong whiff of the Happy Chair and decided that something must be done once and for all. My first impulse was to drag it down the stairs and haul it to the dumpster on the top of my car, but several years of therapy kicked in and I decided to do this in steps.

I reversed the two chairs and am going to see how I like sitting in the recliner.

So far, so good, but it's only been four and a half minutes:

Starting today, I am going to sock away any extra money I find and I'm going to save up for a new Happy Chair. There are several excellent selections online with free shipping, and I think I might be able to find the perfect replacement for the old one. The recliner is lovely...it really is, but I have an aversion to sitting in a recliner at home for some reason because  I sit in one at dialysis.

(OK. I know. Another thing to add to my Dr. Melfi list!)

So the apartment is now cleaned to within an inch of its life and I am going to reward myself with an afternoon in the pool. 

Thanks for your sweet comments about the Great Pool Noodle Incident of 2019. You'll be happy to know that I do have another noodle, and that the "loaner" noodle has found a home at the pool. When I made my coffee this morning, I spied it in the bike rack just near the entrance gate along with a few other pool toys!

Hurrah!

Pool noodles for everybody!

Happy Thursday, Dearies...or as I have come to think of it Spinsterania Day. I hope your day is full of everything that makes you happy! Come tell me all about it!

THEY REALLY SHOULD MAKE PILLS FOR THIS....EPISODE 74

So I went for my splosh yesterday and decided to take along my pool noodle. I don't know how to use a pool noodle, but I take it with me every now and then in the hopes that there will be another floaty old lady there that might be able to teach me how to do so.

Yesterday, though, there was a little girl in the pool all by herself while her person sat nearby blabbing on her cell phone, so I asked her if she might like to play with the pool noodle. (My motives were suspect, since my plan was to let the kid play with the thing and I could pretend to sun myself while watching her from behind my mirrored sunglasses that make me feel like a cHips officer.)

Turns out, there really is no way to play with a pool noodle. You just kinda bob around with it.

Who knew?

When I was ready to leave, the little girl was still happily playing away, so I said "If your mom says it's OK, you can take that home with you to play with when you come again." and her little face lit up and made my day.

And then the little girl's person spoke up. "I'm not her mom and no, we don't want it."

Um...awkward.

I must have fumbled around and chattered like a circus monkey, because what I wanted to say was "Lady...I'm ready to go and the kid is still playing with the damn thing, and I'm not about to jump in there and snatch it out of her hand like some kind of pool noodle Cruella DeVille, so you can either take it home, leave it here, or shove it up your rude little heiney" but what I did say was "Um. Ok. So sorry. Um. I'll just come back and get it later. Um. Have a nice day."

And I left and then forgot to go back to the pool to get the damn pool noodle.

I woke up in a cold sweat at 2am worrying about what the damn pool noodle was doing down there all by itself and even went to the patio window to see if I could spot it floating around or causing havoc or maybe (in my half-awake state) sleeping on a lounge chair.

Nope...couldn't see a thing.

This morning, the cover was on the pool and there was no sign of it, so all I can hope is that it found a good home somewhere and that it will remember me fondly.

So that's my life at the moment, Dearies...I'm hooked up to Beepy, getting ready to stitch a bit, and having a giggle over my Merry Poppins feet:

Happy Wednesday! Come tell me all about your little corner of the world today!

BRING IT ON, TUESDAY!

Well, I'm off to an appointment, and then it's time to tackle a to do list. I have quite a few things that I've been putting off and putting off, and today is the day to get them done.

As a reward, I am going to spring for an un-scheduled Starbucks treat, some time at the pool, and a long afternoon of stitching and movie viewing.

Last night's selections were Danny Collins with Al Pacino and Ninotchka with Greta Garbo. I didn't make it all the way through the latter, but will definitely finish watching it today!

Hope your very own Tuesday is perfectly perfect in every way, Dearies! Come tell me all about it!

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH....SWEET RELIEF AT LAST!

The heat broke overnight, so I awoke refreshed and ready to go! Driving to treatment was lovely, since I was able to breathe easily and wasn't a total puddle by the time I got here.

(And! My fluid gain was very minimal over the weekend, so my effort to behave myself worked very nicely indeed!)

Plum Pudding is coming along nicely again after a few hours last night and an hour so far this morning:

I don't want to jinx myself, but I have been able to stitch with my glasses on today! Normally, I remove them and stitch with nekkid eyeballs, but today I have been able to stitch AND be a Nosy Parker and watch the pod.

Speaking of watching, Pam and Steph from Just Keep Stitchin', Danielle from Stitcherista, and Caroline from Off The Grid Needlearts are keeping my company on the Flosstube today. I keep meaning to have a little binge session in which I view each of their channels from the beginning, but then I get tempted by all of the other channels...Shirl from Tranquil Stitches, Garret from Coffee Stitcher, Lorie from Mischievous Stitches...and on and on.

I just can't say it enough. If you have a needle and thread or diamond painting pen or knitting needles or fabric fat quarters to quilt in your world...thank you! This thing of ours has literally and figuratively saved my life and I am forever in your debt for all you have done and continue to do for me.

Tonight I hope to get a good swim in before dinner and then get right back to some stitching.

How about you, Dearie? What will blow your skirt up today?

WHEW!

I really don't know anything at all about living in the grey or exercising moderation. I go from practically inert for five days to a Sunday morning filled with running to and fro.

We started with Mass at the Basilica over on campus, then the car wash, then the Costco for gas, then breakfast, the cigar store (for JB Magoo), then a quick splosh in the pool. Now I'm tumbling laundry and cleaning the kitchen, while simultaneously slurping my second big cold brew, because my eyes are so heavy I can't keep them open.

Jeepers.

Our heat wave is coming to a close as we speak, thank goodness. The week ahead is supposed to be beautiful, with lots of sunshine, cooler temperatures, and lower humidities.

Absolutely nothing else to report, Dearies. I am going to finish this icy damn good and get that needle back in my hand if it kills me!

What's new in your neck of the woods?

NEW LEAF

OK.

Last week was...eh.

So I sent it on its way last night, had a good long sleep, and am just finishing my second cup of damn good. I'm going to take a dip, have a nice cool shower, and hit the Happy Chair with iced tea and stitching for the duration.

Not much to report stitchy-wise, Dearies. My progress on Plum Pudding has been minimal. I am still loving it...just haven't been able to access the turbo button on my needle.

It is beastly out there, kids, so please be careful if you're out in it today. I am taking all precautions and also minding my fluids, so please don't fret for me.

Happy Saturday to one and all! I hope you get to do whatever your lovely hearts desire today! Come tell me all about it!

BLAH DEE DAH...BLAH DEE DAH

I can't seem to snap out of it this week, but I'm not going to worry about it too much. That would require effort, and I just can't be bothered with myself.

If you have to be out in this beastly weather, please please please be careful and take care of yourself!

WEDNESDAY...WEDNESDAY

Just keeping cool and quiet, Dearies.  What's new with you?

SATURDAY...

TGI...FUTZYDAY

I had ants in my pants today for some reason. I suspect it's because I slept through the alarm and ended up having to rush through my morning routine, which means I didn't get all of my wiggles out before chair time.

Four hours later and I'm home and back in the Happy Chair armed with my Friday treat and JB Magoo asking what's for dinner.

(Answer: salmon, roasted brussel sprouts with shallots, and garlic parmesan rice.)

I'm making good progress on Plum Pudding and am looking forward to a nice cool indoor weekend of stitching on it. I keep waiting to pick it up and think "Eh...not so much today", but it is still blowing my big girl skirt right up!

After Dr. Melfi yesterday, I made a quick trip to the library to re-stack my bedside pile. As I was checking out, right there on the computer screen was a notice for a Learn to Cross Stitch class, and lo and behold it was happening right at that very time and in that very library! So I high-tailed it to the classroom to peek, and it was full of kids being taught by my former Guild sisters!

I was going to make a run for it, because I broke out into the ugly cry because I was so delighted to see them, but one saw me and waved me in, so I spent a few minutes watching and listening and then looking at the kids' progress.

Simply. Perfect.

(But I was sad for the rest of the night because belonging to those guilds was such a joy in my life that I miss terribly.)

(Damn dialysis.)

We're heading into the weekend like a herd of turtles, Dearies! Please, please, please, be safe and careful if you are facing inclement weather. Several of my pod mates are in the hospital due to heat, and I think I heard that the USA Gulf Coast is bracing for a hurricane.

So that's the report for now! I hope your needles or diamond painting pens or colored pencils or crochet hooks are flying! Come tell me all about it!

IN WHICH WE GO BACK TO SCHOOL

Film school, that is.

Summer Film School at Notre Dame.

Jersey Boy Magoo and I decided to attend a program over on campus this July that focuses on four films and a specific aspect of each.

Last night's lecture, film, and discussion after was:

It was wonderful! The theme of the evening was cinematography, and we learned all about the history of it, lenses, angles, aspect ratios, and how shooting something in a specific way can change the entire look, feel, and meaning of a scene.

It was a bit of a long night after a long hard day in the d-chair, but so very worth it.

Next week the movie is "Rushmore", and I think the theme is mise en scene. Not sure what this means, exactly, but I'm sure to find out!

So here is where I get weepy and send a very special thank you to my friend Miss Heritage Hall. After the no good very rotten awfully bad terrible day I had yesterday, she left a comment about an executive order that President Trump signed yesterday. It is a three-pronged approach to address people with end stage renal failure! I only read the high points, but it really did give me a bit of hope. Thank you, dear friend. You always know exactly what to say and how to say it to make everything better.

(But I did get the beejeebers scared out of me. Did you know that 50% of patients on dialysis die within five years of being on it?! This is not a statistic they have ever shared with me.)

(Boy, do  I need to get that transplant!)

Happy Thursday, Dearies! I'm off to Dr. Melfi, the library, and the pool...maybe. In between, I'm hoping for a little stitching and interweb surfing. Do something stitchy today if you can and cone tell me all about it!

JUST NOT MY DAY...

I'm drinking an iced coffee the size of my head, if that's any indication of how things are going today.

Damn, drat, and phooey. It. Is. Hot.

And humid.

(And we all know how much this big girl loves hot and humid.)

My hair is deranged, the front of my old lady t-shirt is soaked through, and my carefully applied GoldBond cooling powder has turned to kindergarten paste in my nether regions.

To top it off, I gained almost seven pounds since Monday despite eating like a nun on an organic kale farm and swimming for almost AN ENTIRE FREAKING HOUR in the swimming pool yesterday.

This would have been just another Wednesday were it not for the fact that the needles hurt so bad I bawled my eyes out and then one of the nurses questioned my effort in trying to get a transplant....as if going through this three times a week is preferable to eating the occasional salad.

Oey, I tell ya! Oey!

If Stewey were here, he'd lead me to the big girl sleigh bed, pat me gently, and tuck me in for a lovely snoozy nap...smelling of baby shampoo and feeling as soft as a sophisticated little chinchilla.

(With an overbite.)

Alas, I am left to my own comfort, it would seem, so methinks a little Plum Pudding, several more ounces of this delicious cold brew concoction, and a cold cloth on my head will just have to do the trick.

Speaking of Miss P...here she is in all her glory thus far:

The Bitsy Bob Cutie was a gift from my sister...she picked up on my growing addiction to them and surprised me with a little stitchy kindness. If you don't know what a Bitsy Bob is, go visit Miss Kelly on the Etsy at That's So Kelly Co (or just do a Google for Bitsy Bob).

OK, enough kvetching, Dearies. Thank you for the vent. If your corner of the world is sweltering, please look after yourselves and all the critters around you...and if you have to be out in this working...God keep you safe!

Do something cool and come tell me all about it!

IN WHICH WE EXPLAIN...

A long time ago, the Dunkin Donuts commercial consisted of a guy who would wake up and proclaim "Time to make the donuts!". And he proclaimed this over and over, day after day.

I feel like I am moving my q-snaps on Plum Pudding over and over, day after day.

Thus, the obscure reference.

Sorry to confuse, Dearies, but out if curiosity, did ANYBODY know what I meant, or did I dream the whole Dunkin Donuts guy?

(It wouldn't be the first time...that's for sure!)

I FEEL LIKE THE DUNKIN DONUTS GUY

Time to move the q-snaps...

MOVING RIGHT ALONG...

Does this qualify me for the Flying Needle Society?

STEWEYMOMMIEVERSARY

Fourteen years ago today I met the love of my life at Willowswamp Farm in Ligonier, IN and he came home and made me a mommie. I love you, Stewey. You are the best thing that ever happened to me...

MY FAIR SPINSTER...

Well, Dearies, the old crazy crackpot spinster is back in the saddle.

I came home from the d-chair yesterday armed with good intentions of a healthy dinner and a night full of movies and stitching, but ended up slobbering on the couch like an exhausted labradoodle for three hours instead.

When I awoke it was 11pm and I was wide awake,  so I did the prudent thing and stayed up until 2am stitching and watching My Fair Lady.

I could have stitched all night...I could have stitched all night...and still have begged for more...

Today has dawned a bit bleary and hot and humid, but I am in the Happy Chair armed with my smoothie and Plum Pudding for company. No pool time for me today...there appears to be an entire country of small people splashing about with their water wings down there, and I am just not in the mood to be "on" today. Invariably, when I go to the pool populated with littles, I end up supervising and entertaining them whilst their parents lounge and take a break. If Magoo is with, he expertly takes over the small talk and hears all about the latest adventures of Emma and her sister Natalie and their dog named Bear (or whomever), but he is in New Jersey and I am left to my own agoraphobic devices today, so inside it shall be.

No nightmares last night, thank God. According to my dealer (aka, the guy at the CBD oil shop), I have been mis-dosing myself.  I was only squirting a half dropper under my tongue on d-chair days. What I should be doing is taking a half dropper every morning to maintain a steady level of it in my body rather than having it jump up and down.

(I'm pretty sure the whole thing is complete hooey, by the way, but if it gets me to faithfully go to treatment and not pass out during cannulation/needle insertion it's worth it.)

My plan for the day is to eat well, rest well, and stitch while watching movies. I do have some patriotic pieces I could play with in honor of the holiday in these here parts, but It might just be another day for PP.

Speaking of...here's a progress pic:

So I guess that will do it for me today. If you are celebrating, please have a very safe and happy 4th of July. Otherwise, have a very sFe a happy Thursday!

P.S. I received a request for my smoothie recipe. Vanilla almond milk, Oikos triple zero yogurt, and frozen fruit. Simple. Today I've got peach and mixed berry yogurt with frozen blueberries and peaches in the magic cup.

P.P.S. Dinner will be burgers on English muffins, potato salad, and baked beans with watermelon for dessert. I wanted hot dogs, but can't trust myself not to eat them like Joey Chestnut, so prudence prevailed.

THEY REALLY SHOULD MAKE PILLS FOR THIS, VOL. 17

Does anybody know why a spinster of a certain age would suddenly start having bad dreams? And, why, perchance, said dreams are full of death and...spiders?!

Good grief, Dearies! It's just not easy being me sometimes.

(Well, all the time, really, but I am making an effort to be a more positive person.)

(Pause for eye roll.)

OK...moving on. Yesterday was full of stitching, rest, and movies. I have been on a bit of a movie kick lately, and watched Moonstruck, Saving Mr. Banks, Patch Adams, Beaches, Notting Hill, and Ghostbusters.

(A real intellectual film fest of cinematic excellence if you ask me.)

Plum Pudding continues to rock right along. I am just loving every stitch, and am truly enjoying some stitchy peace...finally. It only took about sixteen years, but I feel like I finally found my lane.

That's it for Yours Truly today, Friends. I'm off to the d-chair like a herd of turtles! Happy hump day! Do something humpy and come tell me all about it!

MONDAY MONDAY