Nov 29, 2012

JUST DON'T CALL IT A C-R-A-T-E.

I've received a few comments and emails about the large wired box-like structure behind the couch.  Yes, it is indeed what you think it is, but around these here parts we refer to it as Stewey's "apartment".  Aunt Chrissy got so tired of hearing me complain about the PeePalooza situation here at Chez Spinster, that she hauled it in from the garage a few months ago and then had a long talk with you-know-who about how it was to be utilized.  The conversation went something like this:

AUNT CHRISSY:  Stewey, I have a little gift for you.

STEWEY: Oh, Aunt Chrissy!  I just love you so, and can't tell you how much I appreciate all of the lovely gifts that you give to me because I am your very favorite nephew.  Is it an iPad?  A little purple Vespa?  A new smoking jacket?  Did you finally get me that antique valise I've been pricing online? 

AUNT CHRISSY: Well, you're my only nephew, Stewey, but that doesn't mean that you're not very special to me nonetheless.  No, it's not an iPad or a Vespa or a smoking jacket or whatever that last thing was that you said.  It's this (she gestures in the general vicinity of the c-r-a-t-e). What do you think of your new apartment?

STEWEY: (looking somewhat dejected) I think it looks remarkably like the old apartment that I had when I was a puppy and still in training, Aunt Chrissy.  Besides, it doesn't go with the decor in the living room.

AUNT CHRISSY: Neither do your piddles, dear heart.  Now I want you to think of this as your very own private pied a terre.  You know, a little place that you can retreat to for some peace and quiet, or solemn reflection, or when you want to host a little gathering of like-minded friends some evening.

STEWEY:  You mean like my book club or my fabulous replication of Gertrude Stein's Paris Salon'?

AUNT CHRISSY:  Yup.  Exactly like that.  It's your very own apartment.  You may go into it any time you wish, and I promise you that nobody will ever force you to decorate it in a way that will offend your delicate design sensibilities.  Also, this little space will be just for you.  No Bosco or Mo-ther allowed.  OK?

STEWEY: Oh, Aunt Chrissy!  I love it so!  It's just what I needed! 

With that, he jumped into the c-r-a-t-e and hours and hours of vexing frustration (not to mention upholstery cleaning) disappeared.  Every time I leave the house, I say "Stewey, go to your apartment", and he happily hops in for a little confined R&R while I'm gone.  The damn thing has saved my sanity.

So now that we've taken care of this particular problem, I can start shopping for new carpet and furniture and rugs and drapes and anything else that was urine-ally altered by Little Lord Fauntleroy and his magic peenie.  Who could possibly be happier than me?

11 comments:

  1. Hooray for sanity!
    Where can I get one of those for me?

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  2. I love it - this is my smile for the day! Thank you.

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  3. My little terrier loves his crate. He hears the hair dryer in the mornings and finds his way in. He doesnt like to have the run of the house when i'm not there! Hope Stewey continues the good dog momentum.

    Cant wait to see the Harvest House finished. Its on my list!

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  4. Hey Spinster Stitcher - good luck with the "apartment" for Stewey. I've always had great luck with crating my dogs when necessary - they see it as their on little den, and would often sleep there just because. The current love-of-my-life, a boxer named Tessa, refuses to be shut up in such an undignified manner. She thinks she's Marie Antoinette on her way to the Bastille or something. As a result I call her Wreck It Tessa, although she's not really that bad. You've reminded me how sensible it is to be able to crate our fur children, and I must give it another shot.
    Happy stitching, and best wishes to Stewey. Is he having a house warming?

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    1. Good for you Coni! ROFLMAO!! I bet he is loving his "apartment" and it sounds like you are too. Our German Shepard Sydney goes in one just to calm down sometimes. She visibly relaxes in it, but Murry the Irish Wolfhound can't be treated/pushed/ or threatened with getting in one though it is his size, 54Lx44Hx36W. Good thing he is potty trained! LOL! Love your Harvest House. I'm working on Laura's Sentimental Journey.

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  5. I saw it in the photo but didn't want to mention it in case it was a difficult subject. Glad he's enjoying his "new" digs.

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  6. my lab puppy (now almost 8) has his crate filled with toys...the door is almost alway open and he nudges it so if it accidently closes when we are sitting around the family room - He's no longer in there when we are gone - unless he chooses but I am a FIRM believer in c-r-a-t-e training. Good luck!

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  7. LOL at "his magic peenie"

    I have always crated my dogs when I went out. It not only saves the carpet and furniture from their little 'presents', I know they are safe and not getting into mischief while i`m gone.

    Kisses to Stewey and Bosco...

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  8. "Bud" has always had his own little apartment, it was easy getting him use to going into it when he was a pup, a little "Beggin' Strips" and out the door we went. I don't think he would know what to do without it. Glad Stewey is enjoying his "apartment".

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  9. LOL!

    My Cici was so dissatisfied with her apartment that it ceased our PeePalooza for the time being.

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  10. On a different subject - I know you hate those new ND uniforms, but SOMETHING worked for them this year! They have been super.

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