DEAR FRIENDS...

Well, it would seem that there's a lesson someplace about realizing that I am not, in fact, the Boss of everything...including my own life.

The nodule that showed up on the CT scan of my head isn't in my nasal cavity at all. It's actually at the back of my throat, between the top of my spinal column and my airway. It's about 1.5cm long and is shaped very much like a Mike and Ike. 

It does not appear to be a tumor, but rather a swollen lymph node...thank God. The doctor scoped my nose and throat and wasn't able to visualize a bump or lump, and there's no sign of anything else amiss, so we're going to just let it be for the moment and take another look at it in three months. If it's grown or changed, then we'll go from there, but the hope is that it will shrink back to normal.

As I was getting ready for that appointment, I got a call from my transplant coordinator from IU. When I was there in April, I had a CT scan of my torso to make sure all of the vessels there are good and clear to be hooked up to a new kidney. I think they are, but unfortunately, the scan showed something else.

Dearies, I have some pretty significant cirrhosis of the liver. 

In my case, this scarring/damage/nodules is probably the result of either medication or other health issues, since I was never a heavy drinker and have not had any alcohol in the last ten to fifteen years. It's bad news, I'm afraid, since there is no way to reverse it or cure it. My weight loss and careful eating will certainly help prevent further damage, but this is going to get a bit more complicated now in terms of transplant. 

I will travel to Indy on the 18th for more testing, and I've pulled my gut doctor here into the mix so he can weigh in and work with IU on a plan going forward. I don't know if my beloved Dr Goggins does double organ transplants, so I might have to head to Mayo or Cleveland Clinic after all.

Yes, in case you were wondering, I am still in a bit of shock and more that a little numb. I did manage to talk to Dr Melfi today, and spewing everything out was good. Rich being in New Jersey is also good, because it forces me into strong mode and I have to focus and handle my business instead of fall apart.

I hope you will bear with me during the coming months. I just have no idea what's going to happen next and whether or not I will be able/up to blogging every day. I confess that I debated long and hard about posting this news, but we've always been honest with each other and you are, quite simply, my people and I love you.

Prayers are always appreciated, and I promise that they are reciprocated every night when I thank God for my many many many blessings. I just hope I am worthy of them.

I'm off to bed and 84 Charing Cross Road! Please come tell me all about your day! Night night and kiss kiss!