I had a hard crash and what felt like a seizure at the end of my treatment today. One minute I was sleeping and the next I heard my podmate, Miss Pat screaming at the top of her lungs that if somebody didn't come help me immediately she was going to get out of her chair and do it herself.
(The language was CONSIDERABLY more colorful, and from what I'm told, the Good Reverend seated next to her almost had a seizure of his own.)
Apparently, my request to pull 3kg was entirely too aggressive, so I went down fast and hard. Blood pressure plummeted and had I eaten anything, I would have upchucked all over my big girl dialysis tunic, God, and everybody else. Instead, I had wracking dry heaves that rattled the windows.
(How very unladylike.)
Oh, and I sprang forth like a Water Wiggle with the head and face sweat and looked like I had just stepped out of the shower. There was literally a puddle under my chair. A freaking puddle.
I'm positive that in the midst of passing out and dry heaving I also decided to have a panic attack since I heard myself saying "Oh dear, I think I'm dying."
Something about this must have been hilarious, since the nurse started laughing so hard so snorted, which made me start to laugh and snort, so by the time I had gotten one little wit about me I sounded (and looked) like a barnyard gone awry.
I am now home safe and sound...Starbucks administered and cheese and crackers snacked with some pickled cauliflower (one of my very favorite things on the planet). My Jersey Boy is happily on the balcony enjoying a cigar, and I have The Crown on the TeeVee and my Mill Hill sleigh ready to go.
TGIF, indeed! I have two days of Happy Chairing, stitching, and relaxation ahead of me to look forward to. How about you?
YIKES! Take it easy, relax and enjoy the calm.
ReplyDelete(((hugs)))
I love that you can and up laughing. I imagine this is nothing they haven't seen before. I occasionally get ::ahem::: the runs and there is no notice; and I had a bout in the Dermos light machine. Ohhh vey! Thank God They have more than one light machine. They assured me "It happens all the time" Not likely, but i chose to agree with them. I considered never going back... and I am sure that when then saw me at the next appointment they thought... Oh geeez you know who THAT is!? Ruth in Oxnard
ReplyDeleteOh my dear! I too am glad you can go from thinking you are on death's door to writing a funny blog post about it. You are one of a kind! Hope you are getting lost of rest this evening!
ReplyDeleteOh, my! Your spirit, girl! Brava!
ReplyDeleteBlimey oh Reilly! But even then your humour tipped the balance - which was probably a relief for the nurse and of course started the chain reaction back to normality of sorts! Happy stitching at home xxx
ReplyDeleteOMG. You're amazing, keeping your sense of humor about this situation. Praying for that new kidney soon.
ReplyDeleteAnd she lived to tell us about it.....! It is good you can inject a bit of humor in all their lives who witnessed the event. Have a wonderful stitching weekend.
ReplyDeleteThe Lord bless you and keep you prayer answered..... So glad
ReplyDeleteyou could snap back to enjoy the damn good and other diversions
Definitely, let's not repeat that episode .....Enjoy the stitching and the cigar smoke aroma...
You continue to amazing me with your struggles, you are a brave girl and an inspiration to me. And so funny and entertaining to all that know you or know you through your posts.
ReplyDeleteI am also praying for you. You got this!