POPPINS. MISS CONSTANCE POPPINS THANKYOUVERYMUCH.

I just returned from a dip in the pool after running several errands and getting myself lathered up into a sweaty mess, and I'm still chuckling over what a complete and utter nutjob I am.

My swimming companions today were two littles by the name of Owen and Gwen. Owen was, I guess, somewhere in the neighborhood of five or six and his sister Gwen about two, perhaps?

Our pool is constructed in such a way that there is one set of stairs in a corner of the shallower end. Naturally, this is where the littles tend to congregate, so to enter said pool you need to maneuver around them and pray to God you're not smacking anybody in their little heads with your wobbly bits as you make your way underwater.

Most kids mutter something unintelligible and splash away and then sit and stare as I stand in the deeper end and do my old lady exercises. If they have goggles and deploy them, I try exercise restraint and not throw obscene hand gestures their way underwater.

Not today, though.

I was mid-way through the first set of arm circles when two little heads popped up about an inch and a half from my face and started chattering away. Owen has lost three teeth and Gwen asked (quite politely, I might add) to please call her Nemo.

Mom and Grandma both jumped out of their lounge chairs, seemingly mortified that my "big person quiet time" was being interrupted, but something in my brain just clicked and I said it was perfectly OK with me, as long as we could continue our chat in the shallow end, because I was pretty sure neither kid had ever been in water deeper than eighteen inches before, and I was pretty nervous about having to perform a rescue.

When it came time for introductions, I said "My name is Miss Poppins. How do you do?". As God is my witness, I have no earthly idea where the hell that came from, but once out, I decided to run with it.

"Are you MARY Poppins?"

"Certainly not! Mary is my older sister. I am Constance. Constance Poppins. How lovely it is to make your acquaintance."

The poor wheels came so far off the bus after that, that I'm waiting for the doorbell to ring and open it to a squad of Disney lawyers seeking licensing and royalties.

So in the space of about an hour I created an entire family of Poppins sisters. There's Mary and me, and then we have Hildegard, Enid, Gertrude, Solange', Marian, Patricia, Judith, and Hortense.  I was coming up with every interesting name I could think of, and before I knew it I had Poppins sisters flying all over the place, taking care of children and going on adventures and generally saving the day.

Owen was a bit skeptical at first, but when he asked me why I didn't fly to the pool with my umbrella I said "One never uses one's umbrella on a Thursday in September, Owen." and he looked at me like I had just given him the secrets of the universe.

My little excursion into psychosis was just what I needed after such a crazy day, and I confess that I was a little sad that the sun eventually got a little low and the water a little too cold to continue, but both Mom and Grandma asked if I was a teacher or a nanny because apparently these kids had never been so quiet for so long. Gwen, apparently, is normally very shy around strangers, so the fact that she came right up to me and felt comfortable doing so means I'm not a complete loss just yet.

So now I'm home and showered and in the Happy Chair and ready for some REAL Poppins before it's time to call it a night.

I hope your very own Thursdays were wonderfully swell, Dearies! Come tell me all about it!