I can watch eleventy seven hundred hours of the Flosstubes and write extensive notes on how to finish finish something and I can carefully scour the ads for coupons to the JoAnns and the Michaels and the Hobby Lobbies, and I can drive myself to all of the above and wander through every. single. aisle. looking for things to do a finish finish in the style of Misses (see above) and you know what I end up with?
Holy crap on a cracker. I am exhausted. But, I achieved my goal of finish finishing something that I had stitched, so...I'm gonna slap this up on the wall and call it a win.
(But can I just say that it is a REALLY good thing that I do not have the phone numbers of the Dream Team of stitchy finishers above, because as God is my witness I would have called each and every one of them to come get me, slap me silly for thinking I could play Varsity ball with them, and then firmly lead me out of the JoAnns, Michaels, and Hobby Lobbies amd into my car to go home and think about what I've done.)