I'm stitching this with one strand of floss, over one, on 25 count fabric.
We received an extension to the deadline for our guild project (thank you, Miss Sheryl!) so now I do not have any excuse for allowing it to go unfinished. I am still dreading it, but feel obligated to participate and do my best, since I signed up willingly for the darn thing in the first place. I'm thinking it will be a lesson to me in dogged determination, if nothing else.
I'm not sure if it's the moon or maybe just an "off" day, but I am missing Stewey fiercely and have been in sobby tears most of the morning. I know that this is normal and I shouldn't view my sadness as a "setback" per se, but all I want to do is bawl my eyes out and crawl in the big girl sleigh bed with his blanket. That tiny little creature has left an enormous hole in both my life and heart.
Damn...grief is hard work.
I made the executive decision to go to the Downton exhibit tomorrow, so I am determined to set my alarm, get out of bed at a semi-decent hour, and go. If the timing's right, I might actually treat myself to a late lunch/early dinner as well so that I head into the weekend feeling like a normal, well-adjusted, sociallly adept adult person instead of a crazy, introverted, hermit spinster who doesn't own a proper pair of pants.
That's it for today, kids. I'm going to get a refill in my coffee cup, fire up the fireplace, and get stitching! Hope things in your neck of the woods are moving...onward!
Sending you a ghost hug (you can't feel it, but you know it's there). Embrace your craziness and wear it proudly! That's what I do with my weirdness. lol Your stitching, as always, is immaculate.
ReplyDeleteDon't miss the Downton exhibit. I saw it at the Taft Museum in Cincinnati. It is small, but interesting.
ReplyDeleteIn regards to the vertical orientation of the alphabet sampler: for the last two blocks, could you center them on the last row? Or use the third block for some sort of stitching design of your own? Perhaps memorialize Stewey in that last block?
Well, just realized mine is sitting since I started this in 2012. Okay, if you could get yours going I need to pull mine back out and try to keep up with you. Thanks for the challenge. PS.... Time will make you stronger. Sending you love and hugs.
ReplyDeleteI cried and cried and cried about losing Murphy 3 years ago. It just takes so long to heal.
ReplyDeleteI just watched Orietta on flosstube and she is doing rows of four across. I have messaged her to see what she is doing in the last row. I thought of 6 rows of four and centering the last 2 in a seventh row, not doing the "&". Just a thought.
It's time to go save another life! Go get a puppy! It will heal you heart and soul and make Stewey smile. HONEST
ReplyDeleteTotally agree. There is a fur baby needing your love.
DeleteI agree, too, but only you know it will be time. When my third cat died, I waited nine months, then adopted three rescues. Each adoptee adds just that more love to your life, and doesn't take a thing away from the ones already in our memories.
DeleteGrief takes time, and if you "sit" with it when it rears its head you will GRADually work through it. Give yourself time and space to heal. Also remember that love is infinite. You will have room in your heart, when the time is right, to love another doggy without pushing your love for Stewey aside, and it will make both you and Stewey happy.
ReplyDeleteSorry about the tears, but I will tell you that my Sherlock left me April 2005 and I am still tearful at times. We love them so much it will always hurt. They are always in our heart.
ReplyDeleteIf you put three on a row it will be balanced and each row will be the same number. That is assuming you are going to stitch the 27 squares shown.
ReplyDeleteKeep on keeping on...that's all you can do.
ReplyDeletexox
Off to a good start. I'm sorry your having a rough time today. We still have our ups and downs too. Enjoy your exhibit tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteAnyone who has grieved knows exactly what you experienced.
ReplyDeleteIt takes you by surprise just when you think you have
gotten mourning under control... but there is a certain
healing to releasing the unshed tears... tomorrow's excursion may come easier having done so... get out there
and enjoy being out there...a healing of sorts, as well.
Look forward to your alphabet progress....
Wear your tears with pride - he deserved them. And if you try to hold them back, they only resurface in nightmares, which is worse.
ReplyDeleteI did a huge alphabet once, when my kids were still illiterate, four blocks to a row. Which left me with two blocks ... the first one I made an envelope, with a stamp and their names on it, and at the distant, final end I did a bright red letterbox as a conversation piece. Arrangements can be made. Admittedly, mine was just BIG lower-case letters in bright colours against a dark blue background - no pictures, no visual puns. Rating: Can do better!
Dare we hope that you'll report back on the Downton exhibition? It sounds most interesting. And after that, more stitching, please! It's such fun to follow your progress.
All the best from South Africa
Still, it's a start. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's ok to grieve, he was your family.
Mom's been gone 25 years this year, and I still grieve.
No one can tell you what you should do or not do, they are your feelings.
(((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))
Marilyn
Looking forward to seeing your alphabet develop.
ReplyDeleteTha's the thing about grief,it side swipes you out of the blue after initial loss.The result of so much loving and giving,but ones life is enriched by that and is the measure of ones love that grief creeps up on you.Grief needs room too,except you love your dear ones all the time and grief gradually,over time, gets less of a look in.
Hope you have a good stitchy weekend.
Coni, only one thing to say. Sending hugs & prayers, Cathryn
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you Coni. It hurts so much to lose our fur babies. Sending hugs.
ReplyDeleteYou are off to a great start on your ABC sampler, Coni. Hope you enjoy your Downton outing! Coni, it is okay to grieve Stewey; embrace it and it will help you through this journey. Thinking of you!
ReplyDeleteTears are definitely not a setback... just the result of the strain of pulling up your big girl panties and moving forward. It ain't an overnight or a one step process. You are normal! It does get less gut wrenching.
ReplyDelete{{{HUGS}}}
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine stitching on that size canvas - I'd need binoculars! We all grieve in our own way - take all the time you need. And when you have those moments, it's okay. Be gentle with yourself.
ReplyDeleteI had the same kind of day yesterday. My 3 year old niece was here for the first time since and innocently asked where my dog was :( And it isn't like I don't think of her all the time but it was more of my niece missing my Micah that set me off I think. You are right grief is hard work. But it made me so happy to see you started the alphabet! Can't wait to see more of it!
ReplyDeleteOver one? Goodness. Good luck on the project, I've thought of doing too, it's a major undertaking.
ReplyDelete