A bottom border, a few backstitched details, itty bitty buttons and this one will be finished! It truly has been a joy to stitch, and I have promised myself to take this for proper framing and then proper hanging on a wall in the bedroom so I can enjoy it every day.
I confess to feeling decidedly not myself these last few days. I seem to have moved from unbridled happiness and gratitude to the edge of a big fat pity party, and I don't like it. At all. In addition to being miserable to be around when I'm feeling the feelings, I get hit square between the eyes with overwhelming guilt and shame that I could allow myself to go there.
But, contrary to the fantasy in my head, I am, after all, very human. And I suspect that a lot of the physical stuff I'm going through is starting to take a toll on me, and it's manifesting a return of the big black dog.
I know that medication, weather, world events, and turning 60 next week are all adding fuel to this stupid little fire, so I will allow myself a tiny bit of grace for a minute and not get too bent out of shape over it, but still...it does kinda suck.
Enough of that.
Showers to take and errands to run and things to do today, so I better get myself moving. I'd love to camp out under blankets today with stitching and a book, but alas...adulting must be done.
Happy Thursday, Dearies! How are things in your little corner of the world? Are you doing all the things and taking care of yourselves? Come tell me all about it!
Coni,
ReplyDeleteEveryone has days when the big black dog tries to rear his ugly black self. You have been through a lot both physically and mentally. You are continuing to do what needs to be done. You are a strong young woman. I love your blog and you. Prayers to you and yours.
Definitely give yourself grace...your body is still healing and you are adapting to a change in how it functions. Be still and stitch! Buy flowers! Drink the damn fine stuff!
ReplyDeleteHealing is a rollercoaster of emtions and energy. Do what you gotta do then rest and refuel as necessary. There should be NO guilt. Love and hugs.
ReplyDeleteThe black dog always rears its head around this time of year for me. Everyone is celebrating spring and I just want to sit in a corner and sob. There are reasons and my brain can reason it out but my heart refuses to cooperate. I give myself an hour every morning to feel bad then dust myself off and try to get on. It doesn’t always work but I give myself big points for trying.
ReplyDelete((((hugs)))) and extra points from me. Your comment meant a lot to me. Thank you for sharing how you battle that dog
DeleteThe cross stitch is beautiful. I think it's great you are getting it framed. I have a line in my budget for framing. I still haven't done any of my pieces yet. It's a weird kind of procrastination : ( Like my cross stitch isn't good enought to be framed.
ReplyDeleteConi your stitching, as always, is beautiful and that prayer from Julian of Norwich has made many things more bearable for me. Carry on dear lady as best we can!
ReplyDeleteConi, I have battled that awful darkness (don't want to call it a dog--love dogs) since I was in school. I am always amused when at the doctor they ask have many days you have felt sad/depressed. The answer is every day. But just like you are doing, you have to suck it up and do your best to feel better. Meds can give you a helping hand, but nothing can make you happy, except your own determination not to let the darkness win. You have had your share of physical challenges but do give yourself extra grace in facing this. We have a physical challenge that few people will even admit they have--that does take a psychological toll. Sorry this is so long.
ReplyDeleteLovely stitch...love the 🐑🐏! Sorry the black dog is a frequent visitor...sending hugs and good wishes....praying for you daily...xoxo m
ReplyDeleteWe all have something a "pity party" just feels like the thing to do. I admit, you have been through a LOT, and sometimes we're going to be overwhelmed. I say go through it, acknowledge it and pray you can move past it. You're in my prayers. My issues aren't as severe but there are days I'd like prayers too. Hugs, hugs, hugs.
ReplyDeleteConi, your stitch is looking fabulous. Continued prayers and sending hugs and good thoughts your way. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteAs a lifelong depressive, I know the gloom and darkness well. Working to stay in gratitude and walking help me the most on a regular basis. I can't imagine having the health challenges you have. I admire your spirit, stitching and sharing.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who is familiar with that black dog, I feel for you. Coni, you've been through a lot physically, and that takes a toll on us mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Sending love and a prayer to you!
ReplyDeleteConi, we're all the same. There are no perfect lives, and so we're all in this together. To love and support each other, however we can. Keep stitching, and praying and continue to take good care of yourself. I liked the comment above. Give yourself an hour a day, then move on. God bless you and all who love you.
ReplyDeleteDonna