May 13, 2020

MAY 13TH MAKES ME....SAD

It's the day Stewey was born at Willowswamp Farm in Ligonier, Indiana....he would have been 15 today:





And the day Dad died...16 years ago today:
This man was a hero. He was a kind and gentle soul. He lived in "houses with women" all his life.....first Grandma and Aunt Lou (because his own father died so young) and then Mom, me, and Chrissy. He used to joke that even the dog (Charlie) was "fixed". This probably explains why he was the way he was. I don't think I ever heard him raise his voice or say a bad thing about any one or any thing. He was funny and ornery and had twinkly eyes, especially when he was hiding cookies in his shirt pocket. You could talk to him for hours or just sit and watch a football game on a Saturday afternoon, and you'd come away feeling better about yourself and the world you lived in. You could depend on him for anything and knew that no matter how much you had royally screwed up, he was still your dad and he loved you.

He loved chocolate and Snyder's hard pretzels. He always smelled nice and he always combed his hair the same way. He didn't like guilt or mean people and he quietly went about making his little corner of the world a wonderful place. He never bragged or lectured. He never hit or grounded. He talked and explained and made you want to be a better person so that he would be proud of you. He hugged and patted your cheek and always let you know how special you were, even when you felt like the least special person on the planet.

Dad could do math in his head and Chrissy and I called him Rain Man because of his ability to do this. He went to Notre Dame and graduated as an engineer, but spent all of his working life as a management executive for Westinghouse. Chrissy and I never knew how "powerful" or "respected" Dad was until he died and his former collegues wrote to us. We found out that this man we loved wasn't just our hero....he had fans all over the world.

The men that came to the funeral told us that our dad was the smartest guy they ever met and the women told us that they all had secret crushes on him. Turns out that this guy we thought was a "nerd" was actually a very popular fellow and could be the life of the party.

Dad married the love of his life on May 23, 1964 and he held her in his arms the morning she died on November 12, 1987. Dad loved Mom more than anything in this world and he gave life to Father Hesburgh's words: "The greatest thing a man can do for his children is love their mother."
I think that the reason why Chrissy and I remain single is that we decided that we saw what perfect marriage was and we weren't going to settle for anything less.  

13 comments:

  1. (Gentle hugs). Your tribute is lovely. I can read the love in your words.

    ElizabethL in NC

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  2. I am so glad you were raised in such a loving home. You are truly blessed. Sending you comforting prayers.

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  3. Gentle hugs on this sad day. It is also the day 28 years ago, I suddenly lost my husband who was 37 at the time.

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  4. Hugs! I am sorry that the day makes you sad, try and remember all the good things that your dad and Stewey brought to your life. (I loved your dad story!)

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  5. You were greatly blessed by your Dad and Stewey.I am certain that through the years the love shared far outweighs the sadness.

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  6. Beautiful tribute, and you look very much like him.

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  7. I know this must be a difficult day. That was a lovely tribute to your Dad. You were blessed to have such loving parents. And wonderful memories of your beloved Stewey,too. I'm keeping you in my prayers.
    Mary

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  8. Sad, but also warm with so much love.

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  9. Big hugs Coni and lots of love. xx

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  10. What a beautiful story and tribute you shared about your Dad, Coni! Thinking of you!

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  11. I will reiterate, what a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing. You made my day.

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