FUTZUS INTERRUPTUS...

I got up this morning at the crack 'o dawn, exercised, ate a healthy breakfast, packed my bag, and went to dialysis like a model citizen.

(Spinster translation: I woke up late, stumbled into the shower, slurped down a cup of damn good and then went kicking and screaming the whole way.)

My normal tech, Lorie, was absent today...out taking a test or something similarly stupid for certification, so I was under the care of Nurse Wendy.  The Big Big Boss.

(Nurse Jamie is the Big Boss.  Nurse Wendy is the Big Big Boss.)

(All of the other nurses are just Bosses..Boss Eva, Boss Shawn, Regular Boss Wendy (as opposed to Big Big Boss Wendy).

But I regress.

Normally, Lorie is able to get the needles inserted with only a small amount of pain and we chat delightfully as she does so.

(Spinster translation: I pretty much see stars, jump out of the chair, and mutter "Mother of Pearl, Fudge, and Fiddlesticks" under my breath and I give Lorie suggestions as to what activities she can engage in by herself later on.)

(Don't worry.  I always apologize after. I might curse her like a drunken sailor, but I apologize like a freakin lady.)

Today, though, Big Big Boss Nurse Wendy could not get me stuck properly...not for love or money. She tried and tried and tried, and when that proved unsuccessful, she called in reinforcements. 

That didn't work either.

Seems to me that Buzzy decided to run for the hills, and to make matters worse, it feels like nerves were involved in the melee'. My poor arm and hand feel as though they have been plugged into a hot light socket, so here I sit with an ice pack and an appointment to see the surgeon tomorrow morning at 10.

Frickety frack.

So no dialysis for me today. Instead, methinks I will play with needleminders a bit more and see if I can add to the inventory. I think I will have three different minders for offer...small one inch square photos of Stewey, coffee cups, and dot painted hearts.  I am thinking that the Stewey photos will be free with purchase, since I just feel somehow very funny charging for his picture.

(Spinster translation: Who in their right mind would want to pay for these stupid things in the first place, and why couldn't I have learned how to make stuff that doesn't look like it came from the reject bin of a factory powered entirely by one-armed blind crazy ferrets, and when am I ever going to learn that you just can't come up with some facockta idea on the fly and then expect it to work?)

Again with the regressing...

Happy Futzingday, Dearies! I hope that your corner of the world is perfectly swell today! Come tell me all about it!