WHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER FLU-CATION, BY MASTER STEWEY ANGUS WILLOWSWAMP, HIS VERY LITTLE SELF

My mom can't come to the blog right now.  She's sitting in the corner, thinking about what a total beast she's been lately.

It all started with the heat and humidity.  We all know how much the old lady loves to dissolve into a sweaty mess at 8:30 in the morning, and the fact that this hot spell has lasted for several months certainly hasn't helped matters any.

Then we had the annual "THE SKY IS FALLING" marathon of West Nile Virus reports, hurricanes in the Gulf, and the ever-present screaming of the local weatherman to take cover.  This constant barage of newsiness was not at all what the doctor ordered for my stupid mo-ther's tattered nerves.

Just when I thought things were starting to calm down a bit and we had reached a happy medium of napping, eating, and Food Network Tee Vee watching.....the bottom dropped out.  "This Saturday, watch as Gail and Robert celebrate their love on a special episode of Wedding Impossible".  My snoring, slobbering mo-ther bolted upright in the chair and started screeching.   "HE'S GETTING MARRIED???!!!!  MARRIED?!!!  WITHOUT ME???!!!"  And then, to make matters worse, we discovered that Chef Robert Irvine did indeed get married, and to a lovely professional lady wrestler named Gail King. 

Needless to say, THAT particular evening sucked for the full fifteen minutes it took for the sedatives to kick in.

Last week, my beloved Aunt Chrissy came down with the flu and came over so that I could care for her properly.  I tucked her into the Happy Chair and made sure that she had all of the stitchy-ness, TeeVee, and fluids she could handle, and I convinced my pesky little cousin Bosco to be on good behavior.  I think it was good for my Aunt Chrissy, but I know that by Thursday evening, she was definitely ready to go home to her own bed and some peace and quiet.

There has been a little stitching in the midst of all of this.  First up is a piece called Bali Ha'i from the designers Michael Boren and Carole Lake.  This is the September project for Mo-ther's EGA guild, and is found on the Caron Collections website as a free chart.  I think it must be a very enjoyable stitch, since Mo-ther was quiet and behaved during the five or six hours that it took her to stitch it:

The second piece is called Lavender Fields, and is from Needle Delights Originals.  I'm not sure what the hell is going on with it, since the colors seem to be giving the old lady fits and starts.  She received this as a complete kit from my friend Teddy at The Scarlet Thread, but apparently a few of the colors were a bit too "hot" for Mo-ther's liking, so she decided to change them.  All I know is that it now looks like a hot mess.  We'll see if she can salvage it:

August is almost over, so that means that Saturday will find us upstairs in the studio putting together the Official Fall Basket of Spinster Stitcher  Stitchy Fun.  I'm really looking forward to this, since it seems like there's been precious little stitchy accomplishment around here lately.  When did my mom suddenly become a "one at a time" stitcher?  Weren't there days when she had eight or nine different things going at once?  Methinks it's time to give that a try once again.

Until we meet again, I remain your loyal and devoted friend.

With much love,
Stewey