Most people prepare for the new school year with pens and pencils and new folders and notebooks and such.
Me, I prepare with colonoscopies.
Yup. Call it TMI, but suffice it to say that today involves a lot of Jell-o and clear liquids, and tomorrow I will be trying to pretend that I'm at Canyon Ranch enjoying a "rejuvenating cleansing" that will result in shinier skin and a healthy glow.
Truth be told, I don't have one thing to complain about when it comes to these things. My physician, Dr. Mark, is a rock star and has become a trusted member of Team Spinster over the years. He has what can only be described as an appropriate sense of humor for somebody that spends the better part of a day looking at people's heineys, so you have to love that about him and not take the "turn over onto your left side" thing too seriously.
I don't get this test every year because I like writing about it. I get it because Mom died at the tender age of 54 from metastatic colon cancer, and her mother/our gramdmother died a few months before her of the exact same thing. Combine that with the medical wonder that is me, and you've got a surety that a small bit of inconvenience every twelve months will probably save my life. Add that to the sad fact that Aunt Chrissy and I are the last of the Mohicans when it comes to this part of the family tree, and you've got yourself a "shut up and get this done" reason that precludes any discomfort on my part.
So eat your vegetables, do what your doctors tell you, and suck it up and go get yourself checked out every now and then. And if the thought of this type of procedure doesn't blow your skirt up, consider the fact that celebrities everywhere pay tens of thousands of dollars for colonic irrigations that don't come with the added bonus of photographic evidence that you might be around a little while longer to aggravate the hell out of your family members.
End of public health advisory.....