Nice Customer Service Lady: Thank you for calling Target Customer Service, may I help you?
Stupid Spinster: Um, yes, I need to speak to somebody in Customer Service.
Nice Customer Service Lady: This is Carrie. How may I help you?
Stupid Spinster: Hi, Carrie. This is (name deleted at the suggestion of Stupid Spinster's dog who pointed out that once you read this you will surely Google me to see if there is some kind of photograph of the stupidest woman on the planet), I need some help with a credit that hasn't been processed on my credit card yet.
Nice Customer Service Lady: Sure. I can help you with that. Do you have your receipt handy?
Stupid Spinster: Uh, no, I don't. I seem to have misplaced it. (She paws furiously through a basket of mail, bills, paperwork, and magazines that seems to have taken on a life of its own.) Can you just look it up without the receipt?
Nice Customer Service Lady: Sure. Let me get your name, address, and phone number.
Stupid Spinster: blah blah blah blah blah
Nice Customer Service Lady: OK. I see here that you returned a blah blah on .... and that we credited your account immediately.
Stupid Spinster: No you didn't.
Nice Customer Service Lady: ??? Um, yes, Ms. blah blah, I see here that we credited the full amount to your Visa card ending in blah blah.
Stupid Spinster: Well, that money hasn't shown up in my account yet and I am pri-tee darn miffed about it, sister. That's a looooong time for a few electronic blippity bleeps to make their way from your store there on Main Street the whole two and half blocks down to the bank right there on Main Street isn't it?
Nice Customer Service Lady: ??? (rolls her eyes at her fellow nice customer service associate). Ms. blah blah, did you, by any chance happen to call your bank? Perhaps it's on their end?
Stupid Spinster: OK, I'll give them a call.
Nice Banker Lady: Hi, this is Michele in Customer Service at blah blah bank. May I help you?
Stupid Spinster: Listen up, Michele. I want my money and I want it now.
Nice Banker Lady: ???!!! Um, ma'am? Can I help you with something?
(The entire story is recounted in a clippity tone by the Stupid Spinster and then she puts her hands on hips and starts tapping her toe...for emphasis.)
Nice Banker Lady: Ms...blah blah. I see here that the credit was issued by Target on such and such a day and that the full amount was immediately credited to your checking account as per the agreement on your Visa debit. Do you have access to your statement online? If so, you will see that the credit appears on such and such a date and does indeed show the full amount being credited.
Stupid Spinster: ........ (sounds of crickets chirping)
Nice Banker Lady: Ma'am? Is there anything else that I can help you with today?
Stupid Spinter: Uh, well, uh, I guess not. Thank you. You've been very helpful.
(As the Spinster hangs up the telephone, the little dog utters a sigh and heads for the drapes....)
Here's what I'm working on on the stitchy front...Winter Sky by Ms. Laura J. Her Very Self. As I commented on her blog, if the winter sky actually looked like this here in Hoosierville, we probably wouldn't wish for the Spring so much!