Dec 11, 2018


I'm in the d-chair doing my thing, and the gentle cooing and patting of the techs and nurses is exactly what I needed apparently. I wasn't here five minutes before somebody asked me how my appointment went yesterday, and I immediately went into a fullblown ugly cry with sniveling and pitiful tears staining the front of my big girl sweatshirt.


I think I'm just tired and feeling sorry for myself...a feeling that I don't care for one little bit. I'm the girl who wants to hitch up her drawers and say "I've got this!" before doing something impossibly brave. But, as I'm finding out, sometimes you just need to be a weepy mess and let somebody else push the rock up the hill.

Today that task falls to my team here, so all I have to do is snuggle under my blanket and watch something lovely on my iPad thingie. Methinks it will be Flosstube or watching people color on the internets...both of which make me very calm and reassured that the world is indeed a happy place.

Miss Ruth from Beadecked and Beadazzled has come to the rescue with some spools of Trebizond in Parchment, so as soon as they get here I should be able to get back to my LJP Christmas Quilt. Then, if all goes according to plan, I hope to gather the threads for her Christmas Ribbons piece and get it started and underway before the end of the year. I have everything I need except Kreinic blending filament (which I've never used) and Threadworx perle cotton. 

In the meantime, I want to get back to the Prairie Moon piece. I contemplated bringing it to the d-chair, but there are an awful lot of thread changes, and that can be quite a production with only one hand. I think I am also a bit shy about hauling my lapstand with me every time, since it looks like I'm moving in with three huge bags of stuff. Maybe if I consolidate better it won't be so obvious...or maybe I could find a big wheely bag that would sit next to my chair out of the way.

Something to ponder.

What I do know is that I need to make these three days a week a little more pleasant and productive, or I'm going to go even more nutso than I am now. This is a grind for sure, so anything I can do to make it part of a "normal" week would be swell.

My goodess graciou! What's with the blathering on endlessly, today?! I guess I forget that y'all actually have things to do and lives to live and places to go and people to see!

(I guess I also forget that you are reading this and perfectly capable of rolling your eyes, thinking "Geeze, Louise can this woman prattle on" and then delete me from your Palm Pilot.)

So if you've made it this far, I will close with a picture of my dinner from last night:

Tonight will be salmon and broccoli.

I swear.

Happy! The sun is shining and the bells are sweetly ringing! Here's hoping that it's that way in your neck of the woods!


  1. I can identify with your frustration. I am sure that you will hang in and come up with a wonderful solution! I look forward to reading about it.😀

  2. Sending positive thoughts and prayers from NJ. I keep Stewey's little head needle minder on my projects and it just melts my heart. I love all the dogs both past and present! I have 2 basset hounds currently (Bea and Hazel) but so many others before them have left and i have pictures all over reminding me of how much i loved them. and your Stewey fits right in and adds a little class to the group. ( i can blather on too you know lol) I just wanted to let you know that i love the needle minders you made. I hope your time in the chair this week passes without incident and you get home safe and sound.

  3. It's perfectly ok to be a "weepy mess" sometimes. You're doing hard things and I'm glad the staff are being supportive and kind. Also, I really enjoy reading about your cross stitchy adventures and everything else going on!

  4. Coni, thinking of you! I don't mind the prattling or blathering. Sometimes, you just have to and then roll on. What about bringing your coloring with you along with your iPad thing?

  5. When I was taking my friend to her chemo sessions, between the two of us, we frequently had three or four bags. I had a tote bag with some needlework to do. She had her handbag (huge and the heaviest thing ever) and one or two totes with various needlework projects, snacks, and beverages. Nobody minded in the least that we had all that gear with us, since we were there for several hours. Her nurse had our favorite station (two chairs and extra large area) ready and waiting for us. I think you should look into a big wheely thingy. You need to have options to occupy your time (and if your frame is part of that, so be it), snacks, and beverages. Nobody will care. They'll be pleased that you're comfortable and occupied. It is good for the soul to feel like you're getting something done while you're there for hours at a time.

  6. Coni, does reading work for you during dialysis? Or how about some interesting podcasts via your iPad?

  7. Hang in there my friend! You got this (with a little help from your friends). Hope all went well,

  8. Awww.. dahling, you are doing better than you I
    hear some applause out there? You bolster us on our down days and are a model for "if Coni can do it, so can I." Bless you for being you...Your MWF team understands and responds with caring to the tears because you are you, brave
    one. On to the next....

  9. 1 st I want some of that ice cream. It looks sooooooooooo goooooood! Second you are a part of my life. I always want to come in and read and see how you are doing. Whether having a Happy Day or just not so great which might include an ugly mess. We all have them... big or small... all of them are important. Thanks for being so willing to share YOUR life with us. Love, hugs and prayers, Cathryn ♥♥♥

  10. Ice cream? Don't waste the calories on ice cream when you could have had chocolate for dinner. Yummo!

    Sydney, Australia

  11. Mmm ice-cream.... dammit there's none in the freezer at the moment, must rectify! Maybe you could find a project that is one colour thread, red work, or something like a mandala that is interesting to stitch but doesn't need a lot of "stock" to carry around. Or you could use variegated thread instead of one colour could be very pretty, (she types while thinking this maybe something she should try herself) Breaking down and having a bit of a cry isn't being weak, you can only handle so much before you need to release the pressure valve a little so you can pick up and carry on again. You may be The Spinster Stitcher with your fabulous cape, but you are facing one hell of a fight and we as "Your People" are honoured to be here with you. I so look forward to your posts and am very grateful that you have let us into your life.

  12. It always surprises me when I have a good cry. I'm like you in that I like to stay focused on the goal and help anyone who needs me. Sometimes, a good cry is just what I need though. Be kind to yourself!

    It would be wonderful if there was a locker situation at the D Place so you wouldn't have to haul your things back and forth. And so what if you look like you're moving in? If it makes you happy and you can get it in there, bring it with you!

  13. A wheelie cart sounds just the thing. When I was teaching classes at the CATS festivals, I had a cart I bought at Staples. It is a folded flat cart that pops open in a jiffy and has an extendable handle for wheeling it all over. I used it to take kits to classes along with any teaching materials and my purse. It was a lifesaver and I still use it for quilt shows and/or retreats. Best investment I ever made.

  14. A wheelie cart could work perfectly! And a "feeling bad for yourself" day doesn't hurt every once and awhile.