My appointments did not go exactly as planned. The kidney appointment came with the news that I need to have a procedure to check Buzzy for blockages, and this will involve sedation and possible angioplasty.
(I was really hoping to avoid angioplasty, since the idea of a stranger roto-rootering my pipes without so much as a howdoyoudo makes me nervous.)
Then it was a follow up visit about my little ER excursion. Here we learned that a third episode of diverticulitis is normally cause for surgery...do not pass GO, do not collect, etc etc...it means going in and removing that portion of the colon that is vulnerable.
Oey.
And then, just to see if I could make things worse, I decided to go over to the house and sit in the semi-empty living room and bawl my eyes right out of my head.
By the time I returned to CS2 I was completely wrung out...spent...done for. I put on my jammies, crawled into the big girl sleigh bed, and stayed there for the duration. Not one thing stitched, not one word read, not one Flosstube video watched. Just me feeling sorry for myself and wishing It was 1987 again.
Today does not look like it will be much better, but I am determined to shake it off and not wallow. I figured that a good place to start would be to sit with all of my WIPS and get them organized and in a basket or two. I watched Miss Emily of Eclectic Possessions fame do a WIP parade, and it was somehow comforting to see things all neat and tidy in their project bags.
Hopefully, that will be the cure for what is ailing me.
There's nothing to be done on the medical front today. All of the docs are putting their heads together to determine the best course of action going forward. I suspect that the nice folks at IU will put their two cents in about any surgeries prior to a transplant, and my gastro will have something to say about messing about with a Crohn's tummy, but those are discussions well above my pay grade. I'll just be a good patient and follow orders and try not to make a mess of things.
As for the case of the Mean Reds that has me missing home and Stewey and my mom and dad and my sister, etc etc...I'm going to chalk it up to a monthly "situation" and allow myself a good cry or two. But I'm going to refrain from any more visits to CS1 for a little bit...that's just a little more than I can take at the moment.
So we're moving...onward. Maybe not at the exact pace that I would want, but onward nevertheless.
Here's hoping that your Tuesday is exactly what you hope it to be! Do something wonderful and come tell me all about it!
((((HUGS)))) I wish I could just give you a hug in person. When your body is messed up, so are your emotions. Missing CS1, Stewey, family -- of course. And you can probably add some raging hormones, being in the age for menopause.
ReplyDeleteI have some new stitchy projects ready to go on a vacation with me -- Sue Jones's Chester and Shrewsbury boxes. https://suetortoise.wordpress.com/embroidery-and-crafts/embroidery-stitched-boxes/embroidery-stitched-box-instructions/
My stitching and I are headed to a sunny hot location for a week -- the stitching will remain in the room and a bunch of books from the thrift store will accompany me to the beach.
Hope your day improves.
Susan (aka Anonymous)
Oh dear! That's a lot to handle. I know this may seem like bizarre advice, but have you thought about getting another furcompanion? Maybe a cat this time? Someone who will simply be with you when you need some snuggle therapy? And if owning another companion seems a bit much right now, maybe you could get on the visitation list for a therapy animal? You're a tactile person, so you'd probably be soothed by a warm furball. It wouldn't solve all your problems, but it probably would lower your blood pressure and calm some of your anxieties.
ReplyDeleteLots and lots of cyber-support coming your way, Coni. Hold on. Breathe. ox
ReplyDeleteI would gladly share "Precious" with you for snuggling
ReplyDeletevisits were we in closer proximity. Coni dear, caution is
the better part of valor and it should be reassuring on one hand to see that the medical teams is moving ahead with slow determination and certitude...all the ducks lined up....You said it well to just be a good patient and follow orders...let go and let God let them.... In
the meantime, you are being engulfed in loving prayers and caring...whatever we can do....you name it and got it.
Lots of hugs and prayers Coni !! We are all thinking of your and sending positive, healing vibes your way !!!
ReplyDeleteBummer, Coni. But it will get better. It will! Just keep swimming!
ReplyDeletejust letting you know that I am thinking all good and positive thoughts for you!!! hugs and prayers to keep soldiering on.
ReplyDeleteConi, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Sending gentle hugs your way.
ReplyDeleteAll of the above and even people who don't post are sending everything we can to surround you with comfort. Love, hugs & prayers, Cathryn ♥
ReplyDeleteOh, sweetie. So many things all at once. Isn't that always the wsy? It is,in my life. We are all holding good thoughts for you. Each of us, in our own way.
ReplyDeleteI would like to have some tips on organizing WIPs! Love and hood thoughts for you!!!😊
Coni, thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for the situations that pull you down. But you've proven that you will get up and be stronger than we are. Let it out. It's good to feel sorry for ourselves and have a dump day complete with tears (and screams if they help) and do not apologize for it. Wishing you a brighter day tomorrow.
ReplyDeletePlease know that your Breakfast At Tiffany's reference is appreciated by your reading public.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry about your medical stuff!! It stinks when all that hits at once!
ReplyDeleteI am confused about CS1. Is it a house that you have now moved out of into an apartment? Are you going to sell CS1? If so, just let the real estate folks do their thing!
Dear Coni, I find that some good cries are much needed to relieve stress and anxieties, and have been known to cry in doctor and dentist offices, and some other rather inappropriate places. But I need them, and then I get it together and go on. Scared my dentist half to death when I cried when he told me I had to have a root canal. Anyway, the point is, let it out! You have so much going on and it all just builds up. Sending good wishes and many prayers.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could give you a hug, an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on. Things will get better.
ReplyDeleteYou know, sometimes you just have to have a good cry. I know if I had everything on my plate that you have I would have been crying every single day. I would have been crying on the good days too. Tears of joy, that I had nothing really horrendous to cry about. It makes sense that you went to the house to cry. You have a history there that you haven't made in the new place yet. Doing something mindless always helps me. Put all your 310 DMC in a pile then stack your 3011 DMC then unstack it if that helps. I thought of you last night while watching Southern Charm. Thomas decided to quote passages from Jane Austen & Gone With The Wind with regards to Landon & Catherine. He's such a hoot! Know that you're thought about and wished much much better days ahead.
ReplyDeleteSandra In Texas
Prayers, good thoughts & hugs heading your way.
ReplyDeleteLots of good advice here, to which I will only add prayers, love and healthy thoughts being sent your way. This too shall pass. 🐶🐕🦄🌻⚘🌹
ReplyDeleteLuv MaryO1230
It is so normal to miss your loving and supportive family when you are facing all of these obstacles. It is overwhelming. Trust your doctors and your own instincts when it comes to your health issues.
ReplyDeleteA WIP parade may do you a world of good. Go through the projects that bring you joy and make a plan to finish your favorites. I, for one, would love to see all the lovely things you have going. Keep your head up, Coni. The strength will be there when you need it. Xoxo, Susan
A good cry at CS1 makes perfect sense. You feel safe there to let go. You'll feel that way at CS2 one day as well; it just takes time. Having your stitchy things in order will help. I'd love to see a photographic "list" of them. Prayers to you and your medical team. You can do this!
ReplyDeleteRemember that Circle of Caring People that I referred to in a previous post (on Moving Day, I think)....?
ReplyDeleteI'm reaching out to hold you up, and to catch up if you start to fall....
Lynn in southern NJ
Sending you a big big hug!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteConi, if you are ever having trouble understanding some of the things your doctors tell you, my boyfriend's son is doing his residency in Interventional Radiology and I could pass your questions on to him. He's young and smart and super easy to talk to. When a family member was diagnosed with breast cancer, he helped us all understand the wherefore and the why of every test and drug and treatment her doctors recommended for her. In the meantime, stay strong. I am not too far away if you need anything.
ReplyDeletePrayers and good thoughts and hugs coming your way!!
ReplyDeleteI would be crying if I were you too. Hugs!! And I hope playing with your stitching made you feel better!
ReplyDeleteHang in there. My half-brother has had more than 3 hospitalizations with diverticulitis and no surgery. He is still going strong and in his middle 70's (way older than me). Ask about non-surgical solutions. As for the rest - it's normal. Moving, missing folks (and pets), recent deaths, health issues and the whole nine yards are huge stressers and yet part of life. We (the stitching community) are here to support you and tell you it will be ok.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile I am making progress on some of my WIPs. Check out the blog. I'm not as good as you for posting photos but I try any how.
http://needleworkerssamplings.blogspot.com/
Hugs and prayers to you. Sorry you are having so much to deal with all at once.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry Coni. It is hard to move when you are forced to. Give it time and you will hardly remember your old house. When you get unpacked and get some of your things around you that are familiar you will feel better. Wish I was there to help. xoxo Mj
ReplyDeleteConi,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you are dealing with so many issues at once but I know that you'll come thru it stronger than ever. With all the changes in your life it's natural to really be missing the comforts of CS1 and all your family members. Chin up Spinster and lean on us to help carrying you thru.
Donna
Sending hugs Coni, and continued prayers :)
ReplyDelete