Dec 27, 2012

SHE'S SO/SUCH A DOPE


My mom can't come to the blog right now.  She's at the Barnes and Nobles looking for books that will tell her how to be "street".  She's doing this because I caught her perched in her Happy Chair this morning wearing her new headphones while trying to make some sort of crazypants hand gesture that would indicate that she's "down with the lingo that all the kids are using these days".  I swear, if she hadn't gotten rid of her Barbie stereo turntable a few years back, we'd be looking at the horrifying prospects of a dance party.

I'm blaming my Aunt Chrissy for this one, since she decided to get the old lady an iPad.  And because she's my Aunt Chrissy and doesn't know the meaning of "let's take baby steps with my idiot older sister because she's sure to make a hash of it", she went all out and got her more accessories for said iPad than came with our first automobile.

Apparently, headphones are big these days.  I can only surmise that Michael Phelps and all of the other fabulous Olympians had something to do with this, since everywhere you look there are attractive young persons walking around with cans on their heads.

In my stupid mo-ther's mind, she looks like this:  

The reality of the situation, however, is that she actually looks more like THIS:
Well, not exactly, actually.  I see that the lovely lady in the photo above had the good sense to get a manicure before heading to work in the recording studio.  MY old lady hasn't had so much as a good stiff brush anywhere near her paws in about six months.  (Oh, the shame of it all).

So that's the report from Chez Crazy Spinster today.  Mo-ther is trying to recapture her youth while simultaneously trying to figure out where the "on" button is on her iPad, and I'm looking for the sedatives so that I might finally get a little peace and quiet around here.

I do hope that your Christmas was swell and that your every wish came true!  Until we meet again, I remain your loyal and devoted friend....

With much love,
Stewey

6 comments:

  1. Poor Stewey - We got Bruno Mars for Christmas - my children love that I sing at the top of my lungs "Your sex takes me to Paradise" with headphones on while I was cleaning (fear not - they are 19 and 22)I am sure it is lovely. (I can't carry a tune in a bag..) I hope you got ear plugs from Santa!!

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  2. You are such a stitch!! (pun not intended) Thanks for the laughs!!!!

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  3. Good to hear from you, Stewey. Glad your mo-ther got a new toy for Christmas. Did you get a new toy or at least a new smoking jacket? ;) Hope your Christmas was swell too! Hugs, Cathryn

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  4. I laughed so hard I almost wet my pants Stewey you are a hoot.
    Happy Newyear
    Catherine

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  5. Now Stewey, I must tell you that these iPad thingies are pretty space-age contraptions and even the most educated (aka "old people") are finding them fabulous and challenging all at the same time. I'm happy to know I'm not the only iDummy out there! Hugs, Marnie

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  6. I so love reading your blog!!!!!!!!!!
    You always make me laugh and feel happy. Yay!

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