Jan 16, 2012


I'm blaming this one on the dog. I was all settled in to the Happy Chair last night, happily watching the Golden Globes and stitching away. You know...la la la la la...all is well with the world...I'm happy and content and haven't a care in my little brain. There was a cheery fire in the fireplace, my toes were cozy with some fabulous new socks Aunt Chrissy got me at the Targets, and I figured within a matter of an hour or two I would have my second FeeNee of the new year.

Alas, it was not to be.

At 11:01 exactly, Little Lord Fauntleroy decided that it was time to go to bed. First he whined at the back door. (I let him out promptly, just in case you were wondering if THAT might be the reason why he pees on anything and everything that isn't moving.) Then I went to the cookie jar to get him a tiny bone because he did, in fact, pee on the outside of the house and not on the inside as is his usual custom. Usually he stands right beside me as I reach into the jar, so when I looked down and didn't see him, I panicked a little.

"Stewey! Where are you, my Baby Dear? Come get your tiny bone!"

The reply came from the doorway to the bedroom. (It is here that you should note that he was not IN said bedroom because we now have a lovely baby gate that prevents him from going in there without express permission from moi.)

"Mo-ther. I'm standing here like patience on a monument waiting for you to open this ridiculous contraption so that I might go to bed."

(At this point he turned and gestured dramatically in the general direction of the baby gate.)

"Stewey, Mommie had to put the baby gate there so that you wouldn't go into the bedroom and decide to water my closet, my bathroom cabinets, and the big girl sleigh bed."

"How do you know it was me? Have you been trained in the scientific arts that would conclusively determine that I am the sole source of the problem? How do you know that you aren't waking up in the middle of the night and lifting your very own leg on your clothes, the bathroom cabinets, and the big girl sleigh bed, hmmm?"

(This is when the dumbfounded look came across my face as I contemplated the possibility.)

(And then I realized that I was getting gaslighted by a nine pound dog.)

"You know damn well that it wasn't me, Mister, and if you don't stop with this whole marking thing I'm going to take you back to the swamp where I found you. Enough already. I'm 45 years old and deserve to live in a house that doesn't qualify as a "before" situation on TLC. Now come over here and get this damn tiny bone so I can finish my stitching and then go post about it on my blog."

(With that, he peed on the baby gate.)

So that's why I didn't get the piece finished last night. I am determined to do so this afternoon, though. Right after I take down the Christmas decorations, do the laundry, clean the house, solve world peace, and finally determine why hot dogs come in packages of ten and buns come in packages of eight. If there's any time left over, I promise to go upstairs to fetch the eleventy-billion projects that I've started, organize every scrap of thread in my stash, and separate the ice cubes into categories according to size, texture, clarity, and shape. Finally, I'll watch all of the crap I've taped on the recording thingie, write pertinent and smart essays about each, and then, once and for all try to figure out why Jeffrey Dean Morgan hasn't returned any of my invitations to come over for meatloaf and Merlot.

Stay tuned, kids! I'm feeling inspired!


  1. It looks great. Can't wait to see it finished.

  2. What a lovely piece. Hopefully, once you have decided the hot dog dilemma you will share it with us all!!

  3. Your LK piece is stunning Coni, it just jumps off the linen :)

  4. Coni,

    So lovely a piece! :) I did notice that you don't have the past years finishes on the right hand side of your blog like you used to...is this an oopsie by Google? :)

    Have a wonderful day!

    Hugs and Love to you and Stewie- you never fall to make my day and make me laugh. (I especially agree with the hot dogs and buns conundrum)

    Jennifer from Honesdale

  5. None of my business, of course, and I am sure you have addressed this previously, but Master Stewie is *er um how shall I put this* no longer capable of reproducing, right? Because if he is, dear doggie, that might explain the marking. If he is not, then I don't know why you haven't bought him his own little bucket and sponge and made him do his own clean-ups.

  6. So glad I had swallowed that gulp of coffee before getting to the "blowing coffee out of the nose" part. :-) I don't remember if you said what color of linen you are using. Yours sure looks heaps better than any of the photographs I've seen of this piece. I certainly didn't inspire me until I saw yours. As to the hot dog/buns thing, I think it's in case you are BBQing and you can burn two and still have buns to go around. lol
    Hugs from Tucson,

  7. You are lucky baby gates work. I'd have to stack them all the way up the door. Emma is going to be 9 this year and she's STILL not 100% outside trained. She just told me that if I had to squat in wet grass/snow up to my butt, I'd be peeing on the floor inside too. ~sigh.

    Good luck solving the hot dog dilemma! :)

  8. Oh poor Stewey..getting all upset....by the way, i absolutely love the stitching...it looks wonderful!

  9. Your L*K is looking fantastic. Glad you are going to solve all the troubles of the world today, that way I can take them off or my to do list!

  10. You know I thought for a moment there Stewey had you convenced that he wasn't the peepee bandit, glad you caught on to him. Maybe he's broken and needs to be FIXED? Hope you get to finish your beautiful stitching.

  11. What a neat sampler! You certainly will have it finished in no time flat. Love the little snowman and reindeer!

  12. My day is always a little bit better after a visit to Spinster and Stewie Land.

  13. What beautiful work!! We are a family adopting 2 little girls with Down Syndrome. As a fundraiser, we are holding a quilting contest. I thought some of your readers might be interested in entering. Would you mind spreading the word for us? You can find out all the details at:

    Thanks for your time and help!
    Kelly Grove

  14. Beautiful stitching, love the colors.

    Oh, Stewie stop this mindless pee-ing on things. I and Miss Molly could not stand it if you were banished to the swamp!!

  15. I was wondering how Stewie felt about Uggie being on the red carpet last night. Dash was delighted to see one of his brethren finally getting credit for JRT style!

  16. Stewie..I look forward to mom telling me about your latest adventure. Mom laughs a lot ,but if it was me doing it she wouldn't think it was funny at all. Sorry that your mom wouldn't let you go to bed when you wanted. A guy needs his beauty rest.....your friend Scully

  17. This is why I am a cat person.

    It doesn't explain why I took over care of a dog which does the same thing given a choice of inside or outside - especially when that outside is too hot, too cold, too stormy, too snow covered...too outside!