Nov 18, 2009


As has been previously reported, I am in the midst of some major stitchy angst. (When am I ever NOT in the midst of some major stitchy angst?)

It all started when I got the bright idea to stitch Laura J. Perin's Rusty O'Toole. This is a completely charming picture of a scarecrow and pumpkins and other fall accootramauo. I loved it the moment I first saw it and had it in my stash before you can say "Ridiculously Spoiled Spinster".

When I went up to the studio to retrieve said chart, it was nowhere to be found. Nowhere. I mean NOWHERE. I even got down in the floor to see if it had slipped out of its protective binder sheet and fallen behind the LJP bookshelf. (Note to Laura J. Perin: This might be a good time to go ahead and file that restraining order....when somebody has a bookshelf dedicated to you, it's time to call in the authorities.)

Anywhoose...I fretted and fretted and fretted and then did what any logical stitcher would do. I called Aunt Chrissy. I called Aunt Chrissy and did my very best to do a mental mind warp on her to try to convince her that I had loaned her the chart for perusal and that she had failed to return it to me. (This is where I should probably explain that Aunt Chrissy and I do not share charts. If we both love a pattern, we both purchase it. We somehow feel better about this, and I'd like to think it's because we are very sensitive to copyright issues. Truth is....we're selfish.)

But I regress.....

I obsessed over that damn chart for two days and was still bitching about it on the way to the market last night with Aunt Chrissy as my passenger, when we passed a new "Assisted Living Facility".

"Oh, look! Isn't that just the most lovely place you've ever seen?!", Aunt Chrissy exclaimed. "They have a gazebo and a little pond and they've even hung Christmas lights for a festive flair! I bet they even have a separate building you can go to when you need to have full-time nursing care."

This sent a cold chill down my spine, and as I gripped the steering wheel tighter so as not to drive off the road and just put us BOTH out of our misery, I made a mental note to keep my crazy to myself and NOT involve Aunt Chrissy in any more of my compulsive stitchy shenanigans.

As proof of this new-found attitude, I didn't fly into hysterics when I was frogging the thread out of the Indian Autumn project and cut a big huge slice right through the canvas. I just picked up the phone and said "Oh, hi. What 'cha doing? Me? Nothing special...just thinking about a new project and how completely calm and sensible I'm being about the whole thing."

Aunt Chrissy was not impressed, and despite her best attempt at non-committalness, I could almost hear her mentally decorating my new "apartment" at the "lovely facility" and planing the estate sale of all of my crap out on the front lawn in front of God and everybody.

So this is why I don't have any stitchy pics for you today. I am calmly, sensibly, and non-compulsively planning some new projects in my studio, and I will have a few hours of enjoyable and non-stressed out stitchy time this evening to report on tomorrow.

(If you don't hear from me.....please call the somebody and check the attic, will ya?)


  1. Oh Coni - Rusty will show up - at a time when you are not looking for him - that's how missing projects play hide 'n' seek!
    Are you able to patch a small piece of canvas to the back of IA so that you can continue with this lovely project?
    ((((HUGS)))) - sending them to you, because it's obvious that Stewie is being selfish and holding back on them in your time of need.
    Hang in there...

  2. Oh my goodness - is there any way that you can do something to patch that canvas? I hope that you find your project. It's probably right in front of you - attached to something. Usually works that way for me - right in front of my darned face. Anyway, I always enjoy reading your posts. You bring a smile to my face.

  3. Stewey took it! He's conspiring with Aunt Chrissy to get you into "the home". Beware of dogs who say they want to frog stitch for you.

  4. It is best to remain calm. My son is already looking for my 'home' and the quality of it depends on how nice I am currently being to him... also if I am nice I get prettier mu muus....

    I hope you can salvage your canvas!

  5. Actually, I am looking for my "own" HOME, but it has to have a walk in closet (even bigger than my bedroom) and a HUGE solarium where I can sit and stitch all day and a HUGE TV room with fantastic but inobtrusive lighting so I can stitch all night. You see, when I am in the HOME, I will not have to do any housework, or laundry or cooking or anything else which currently interupts my stitching time! And I won't even have to stop plying my needle to be polite to anyone if I don't feel like it.

    Don't worry about the missing chart, it is probably under the latest issue of the latest magazine you received.

  6. I'm sure Rusty will show up somewhere. Probably the freezer.
    Good luck salvaging the canvas~

  7. Cn you weave in some threads that are the same as the canvas you are using? This would save you canvas.
    You hilarious woman! The project will turn up eventually.

  8. Stop looking for Rusty and you'll be sure to find it. Maybe it's fallen into the deep abyss into which some of my needed threads have gone.

    The canvas--eek. I don't know anything about needlepoint other than admiring the designs so hope you can patch it or something!

  9. Coni, any luck finding Rusty? This is the 20th and no word from you......are you still in the studio? Don't forget to feed Stewey.....

  10. OK, this is how to find Rusty. Since you've already looked everywhere, you can skip that step. Now you shout, "Some stupid son-of-a-bitch stole my Rusty chart!" You may need to say it a few times. It will appear.