SOMEBODY CALL BETTY FORD

(NOTE FROM THE EDITOR ON THE MORNING AFTER: I would like to clarify that the mess below is not at all a prime example of BUZZ BLOGGING. I was perfectly sober when I wrote it and my sister will attest to that fact. I am not against imbibing in the alcoholic arts....I just don't do it for medicinal reasons. But, you'll be happy to know that I seem to have one heck of a hangover this morning.)

Oh dear oh dear oh dear. I am in some SERIOUS STITCHY WITHDRAWL and I need a fix. Anything will do....an odd little piece of cross stitch on Aida or a little counted canvas that I could stash into my purse.....anything. Anything at all. Just give it to me. Let me run my fingers through some Silk & Ivory, or just give me a glimpse of a new Laura J. Perin. I NEED it! I need just a little something to get me through until the weekend. I promise I'll be good...just give it to me. GIVE IT TO ME NOW!

I'm sorry for the dismal lack of stitchy progress, but the truth is that I have not stitched in 47 hours, 15 minutes, and 24 seconds. I don't know why this is, but I just looked at the clock and said "Stewey! It's after midnight and Mommie hasn't put a thread in a needle since....Stewey? Are you listening to me? Where are you?"

Stewey is safely tucked away in his little bed, peeved at my "night out" with the girls for Mexican food. (Note to self....four lemonades and a border cobb salad were probably not the best idea for a heartburn-avoidance type of meal. Oey.)

So, I will take this opportunity to share this fact with all of yous (Yes, I meant to say "yous"..it's a New Jersey thing. Leave it alone.) (P.S. DON'T write to me and gripe about that comment....I LOVE New Jersey and happily lived there six years of my life and I'd do it all over again in a New York minute.)

(Does lemonade HAVE caffeine?...hmmmmm.) (I'm suddenly feeling like the crazy-ass jazz guy from Sex and the City.)(I think his name was Ray.)

OK, what I wanted to say is that I am pretty sure y'all have lost your damn minds because a) you keep reading my ridiculous drivel, and b) you keep giving me these wonderful awards for doing it! Don't you know that nominating me for these things just encourages me to keep going? If we're not careful, people, I'm going to get cocky and NOBODY needs to be subjected to that. (At least not without cocktails and a well-qualified mental health professional on standby.)

But I can tell you this (cue the dramatic music)....I am so thrilled to be a part of this thing we call stitching. I feel as thought I have been invited to sit at the cool kids' table, and I'm not getting up. Nope. No way. So thank you for being the cool kids and thank you for not minding that I've crashed the party. Your accolades and support are genuinely appreciated and I hope that you know the feeling is very heartfelt and very mutual.

I know that I am supposed to be nominating folks in return, but I simply cannot limit myself to a few of the blogs that I read daily. I am humbled and inspired and wowed and blown back in my crappy desk chair every single time I see what you're up to. Thanks for letting me into your stitchy world.

Goodnight Cleveland! We love you!