Miss Sherry L was absolutely and positively correct in warning me about not setting specific goals with this whole weight loss thing. Sherry, you must know me too well, because I have done exactly what you knew I would do.
I have fallen off the wagon and entered backslide territory.
So....new rules.
Instead of having a specific date on which I want to hit a certain goal, I am going to concentrate on incremental weight milestones. And, to really motivate me (as if getting a kidney isn't reward enough), I am going to reward myself at the achievement of each goal with an item from my wish list.
(Please forgive the kilograms, but for me it's just easier to keep everything consistent with the scale at dialysis.) (But if you are really curious, one kilo equals 2.2 pounds). (Oh, and who doesn't prefer reporting their weight as 112 versus 248?!)
Yesterday's off weight was 112.4kg.
My first goal is 110kg.
I think my treat for 110 will be a 2020 Erin Condren life planner. I order one every year and enjoy and use it happily, but it seems to be a luxury and worth working for. I probably won't hit the goal until sometime in January, but keeping my dates and notes on plain paper and not in a pretty notebook might be just the little swat on the heiney I need to get back on track.
Friday off weight will still be the measure, and I'll continue to report on this here blog because I need the accountability. You should all, by the way, please consider that a huge compliment. I am so very much in love and awe of you that I don't want to let you down and fail at this thing. Your motivation and encouragement are precious, and I want to be worthy of it all!
So...110 here we come!
Dec 3, 2019
TUESDAY
Dessert for JB:
Needleminders from SiggysCloset on the etsy:
Crackpot spinster Christmas trees:
Crackpot spinster fireplace:
Damn good #2...the medical one:
Snow on rooftops...almost:
Progress from yesterday on LJP Christmas Ribbons:
Agenda for the day:
Dessert for Spinster:
Dec 2, 2019
Dec 1, 2019
Nov 30, 2019
THE OFFICIAL 2019 SPINSTER STITCHER CHRISTMAS BASKET 'O FUN
It took me all damn day, but I finally decided on two projects for my Christmas stitching basket.
Two.
For the entire basket.
(heavy sigh)
First up is a Laura J Perin canvas work piece:
I haven't worked on canvas in quite some time, so this will make for a nice change of pace.
The second is a Charlie Brown Christmas cross stitch, complete with matching project bag, accessory tote, and grime guard:
Be still my heart, right?
But tonight I am exhausted, so methinks I will just play with Hoity Toity a bit and have the official start of holiday stitching commence tomorrow afternoon when we get home from church and I've thrown a few decorations here and there.
Hope your Saturday was swell!
Two.
For the entire basket.
(heavy sigh)
First up is a Laura J Perin canvas work piece:
I haven't worked on canvas in quite some time, so this will make for a nice change of pace.
The second is a Charlie Brown Christmas cross stitch, complete with matching project bag, accessory tote, and grime guard:
Be still my heart, right?
But tonight I am exhausted, so methinks I will just play with Hoity Toity a bit and have the official start of holiday stitching commence tomorrow afternoon when we get home from church and I've thrown a few decorations here and there.
SATURDAY
That's a whopping 248 pounds, Dearies.
I wallowed and self-sabotaged and bitched and moaned and complained to nobody in particular, and then I put myself to bed early and decided to call it a day.
Today is a new one, and that means that I have the great blessing of starting fresh. I can right the ship, get back on track, and adjust my course. Three lousy pounds is not going to be the sum total of my experience on this big blue marble, so I'm hitching up my socks and moving onward.
Many of you comment about my strong will and determination. I have two answers for that. One, is that this isn't about fitting into a teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini, and two, I come by this bull-headedness honestly. My Grandma Loukos used to say "Connie Dough, it's a good thing you're named after your aunt and uncle, because you are a little bull head just like they are."
What can I say? I might not be the brightest or most talented or strongest or prettiest girl in the room, but I've got a head like a big block of granite and I will bang it against the wall with the best of them! My mom was all of 5'4" tall and weighed maybe 110 pounds, but she could re-arrange a room full of furniture, mow the grass, clean the house, and keep us from killing each other without smudging her lipstick.
In other words, I seem to come from a long line of little bull heads.
So now that I'm getting on with it, there is damn good to be savored and a paper and magazines to be read, and Christmas decorations to be contemplated. My to-do list is flexible, though, and if I don't make it past the paper it will still be a very good day indeed.
Happy Saturday to one and all. What are you doing to make yourself happy today? Come tell me all about it!
Nov 29, 2019
Nov 28, 2019
Nov 27, 2019
FUTZINGDAY...I THINK
Good morning, and a hale and hearty hello, Dearies!
Well, I seem to have lost a complete twenty-four hours.
I went to the d-chair yesterday, but had more issues than Vogue with my treatment. Blood pressure crashes, severe cramping, tummy upset...you name it...I had it. JB managed to get me home, but I have no recollection of anything that happened after that. I. Was. Out.
But today has dawned, and I am upright and almost through my second cup of damn good and the paper. I had a nice long video visit with my nephew puppy tot, Bosco, checked my Thanksgiving provisions, and got myself cozy in the Happy Chair with West Wing and some stitching.
In other words...I am ready to ROCK this Futzingday!
The holiday is upon us! I am looking forward to watching the parade and cooking and eating tomorrow, and I promise to be very very careful...only a small portion of each thing and a nice long walk in the afternoon. Friday will be another d-day and then on Saturday I am going to tart this place up like a Radio City Rockette!
I hope that you are having a splendid day and that you are doing everything you want and nothing you don't. Come tell me all about it!
Well, I seem to have lost a complete twenty-four hours.
I went to the d-chair yesterday, but had more issues than Vogue with my treatment. Blood pressure crashes, severe cramping, tummy upset...you name it...I had it. JB managed to get me home, but I have no recollection of anything that happened after that. I. Was. Out.
But today has dawned, and I am upright and almost through my second cup of damn good and the paper. I had a nice long video visit with my nephew puppy tot, Bosco, checked my Thanksgiving provisions, and got myself cozy in the Happy Chair with West Wing and some stitching.
In other words...I am ready to ROCK this Futzingday!
The holiday is upon us! I am looking forward to watching the parade and cooking and eating tomorrow, and I promise to be very very careful...only a small portion of each thing and a nice long walk in the afternoon. Friday will be another d-day and then on Saturday I am going to tart this place up like a Radio City Rockette!
I hope that you are having a splendid day and that you are doing everything you want and nothing you don't. Come tell me all about it!
Nov 25, 2019
AND...WE'RE BACK
I confess that my weekend was a complete and total blur of nothingness. I was supposed to go to 8am Mass and then dialysis yesterday, but didn't quite ever make it out of the big girl sleigh bed. I don't know what my problem was exactly, but I was sickety sick sick.
Today, though, was a totally different story. I got up at a decent hour, had my two cups of damn good, watched a little West Wing (I'm bingeing it again), got a big burst of energy, and cleaned the apartment like an Amish lady.
I somehow even managed to do four loads of laundry and clean and organize the fridge, freezer, and pantry and then hop in a nice hot shower and put on clean clothes.
Will wonders never cease?
Rich should be here shortly with all of the Thanksgiving feasting provisions. We got the bird on Saturday, but he insisted on shopping for all of the other things today. This will be an enormous test of my ability to go with the flow, since I am sure that his list is sensible and proportioned correctly, as opposed to mine which would require two carts and a herd of sherpas to get it up here.
(The menu will be the same, but we're going to try to cook for two this year instead of two and twenty.)
Wish me luck.
If all goes according to plan, tomorrow will be a dialysis and Notre Dame basketball day and Wednesday will be a day to rest and maybe do a little bill paying and paperwork. Thursday is Thursday, and then Friday will be another d-day. Saturday will be decorating day and then hopefully Sunday will get us back into routine with Mass and breakfast out.
So the week is planned, the house and Yours Truly are clean, and the holidays are upon us, Dearies!
Hoity Toity continues...I'm going to get right back to it as soon as I leave you:
Happy Monday! Do something fun and come tell me all about it!
Today, though, was a totally different story. I got up at a decent hour, had my two cups of damn good, watched a little West Wing (I'm bingeing it again), got a big burst of energy, and cleaned the apartment like an Amish lady.
I somehow even managed to do four loads of laundry and clean and organize the fridge, freezer, and pantry and then hop in a nice hot shower and put on clean clothes.
Will wonders never cease?
Rich should be here shortly with all of the Thanksgiving feasting provisions. We got the bird on Saturday, but he insisted on shopping for all of the other things today. This will be an enormous test of my ability to go with the flow, since I am sure that his list is sensible and proportioned correctly, as opposed to mine which would require two carts and a herd of sherpas to get it up here.
(The menu will be the same, but we're going to try to cook for two this year instead of two and twenty.)
Wish me luck.
If all goes according to plan, tomorrow will be a dialysis and Notre Dame basketball day and Wednesday will be a day to rest and maybe do a little bill paying and paperwork. Thursday is Thursday, and then Friday will be another d-day. Saturday will be decorating day and then hopefully Sunday will get us back into routine with Mass and breakfast out.
So the week is planned, the house and Yours Truly are clean, and the holidays are upon us, Dearies!
Hoity Toity continues...I'm going to get right back to it as soon as I leave you:
Happy Monday! Do something fun and come tell me all about it!
Nov 24, 2019
Nov 23, 2019
SATURDAY SPINSTER BLISS...
Today the frost is on the pumpkins out there in Hoosierville, but I am cozy and toasty here in the big girl sleigh bed with lots of good things to keep me occupied:
I will get up at the crack of dawn tomorrow and go to early Mass and then to the d-chair. Because of Thanksgiving, I am on a Sunday-Tuesday-Friday rotation this week. That means that today will be an absolute rest day for me so that I can have enough oomph to cook and enjoy all of the festivities. It will be just Magoo and I, but as you probably figured, I will cook enough to feed a small country.
As soon as I read the paper and get a good hot shower, I am going to settle in with Hoity Toity. I have completed the bottom portion of the border and a little bit of each side border, so now it's on to the middle areas! I'd show you a pic, but at the moment, it's sleeping nicely on the ottoman, and my toes are too toasty here in the bed to get up to retrieve it. Forgive me?
So that's it for now, Dearies. I hope you're having your own bit of happy. wherever you are. Please do something lovely for yourself today, even if it just means looking in a mirror and smiling at what you see!
Back to the bliss!
Nov 22, 2019
Nov 21, 2019
IN WHICH OPERATION GO BECOMES OPERATION KEEP GOING
Raise your hand if you saw this one coming....
The exam room door opened and Dr Goggins walked in (looking totally handsome in his scrubs by the way) and I immediately burst into the ugly hiccuping snotting all over the front of my Woman Within clearance sale shirt cry right there in front of him, JB, and everybody.
It's a go.
As of 10:10 this morning, I am officially cleared by the Indiana University transplant team to receive a new kidney.
A living donor kidney is obviously the best outcome, but now I am officially activated on the UNOS list for a cadaver kidney when one becomes available and it's my turn. Living donation would mean a new kidney within a matter of weeks/months. A cadaver kidney might be another three to five years.
BUT.
Dr Goggins took amazing pity on me today and was very clear that this weight loss fight is not over. If I re-gain that weight the deal is off and I'll go right back to square one. Instead, he would like to see me just concentrate of steadily losing so that I have a buffer/wiggle room for the occasional celebration/slip up.
Operation GO was all about reaching a goal. I've obsessed about the number on the scale (and rightly so) for months now, and have driven myself to the point of hysteria with every ounce both up and down. It worked...but just barely.
Operation KEEP GOING is going to be different. Instead of setting a hard number goal, I am going to just try to make better choices and add a little exercise into the mix. That's it. No more counting almonds or weighing yogurt or having a nervous breakdown over a hot dog. I am going to eat food and live my life and try to get off my big fat heiney each day and take a walk or go for a swim.
I am still going to blog my progress on Fridays, Dearies, because I really am convinced that baring my soul on this here blog is the only thing that helped me get to this point. But instead of trying to meet a specific end weight, I am just going to make the goal to weigh less than the week before. That's it. Whether it's one ounce or one pound...just less that the Friday before. And in between I'm going to stop obsessing and just get on with it,
If that number goes in the wrong direction, God forbid, then I know what needs to be done to get back on track. But for now, my brain needs rest and it needs to get back to fun stuff like stitching and annoying my JB.
I would be completely remiss if I did not end this post with the most sincere thank you of my like. Your constant love and support and encouragement and tips and noodges and help have been positively invaluable to me. I. Am. Just. Not. Worthy. Of. You.
Time for some stitching, I think. It is just as grey and rainy and gloomy as it can be outside today, so I am looking forward to some cozy time with Hoity Toity and the Flosstubes!
Happy, happy, GO DAY, Dearies! Onward!
The exam room door opened and Dr Goggins walked in (looking totally handsome in his scrubs by the way) and I immediately burst into the ugly hiccuping snotting all over the front of my Woman Within clearance sale shirt cry right there in front of him, JB, and everybody.
It's a go.
As of 10:10 this morning, I am officially cleared by the Indiana University transplant team to receive a new kidney.
A living donor kidney is obviously the best outcome, but now I am officially activated on the UNOS list for a cadaver kidney when one becomes available and it's my turn. Living donation would mean a new kidney within a matter of weeks/months. A cadaver kidney might be another three to five years.
BUT.
Dr Goggins took amazing pity on me today and was very clear that this weight loss fight is not over. If I re-gain that weight the deal is off and I'll go right back to square one. Instead, he would like to see me just concentrate of steadily losing so that I have a buffer/wiggle room for the occasional celebration/slip up.
Operation GO was all about reaching a goal. I've obsessed about the number on the scale (and rightly so) for months now, and have driven myself to the point of hysteria with every ounce both up and down. It worked...but just barely.
Operation KEEP GOING is going to be different. Instead of setting a hard number goal, I am going to just try to make better choices and add a little exercise into the mix. That's it. No more counting almonds or weighing yogurt or having a nervous breakdown over a hot dog. I am going to eat food and live my life and try to get off my big fat heiney each day and take a walk or go for a swim.
I am still going to blog my progress on Fridays, Dearies, because I really am convinced that baring my soul on this here blog is the only thing that helped me get to this point. But instead of trying to meet a specific end weight, I am just going to make the goal to weigh less than the week before. That's it. Whether it's one ounce or one pound...just less that the Friday before. And in between I'm going to stop obsessing and just get on with it,
If that number goes in the wrong direction, God forbid, then I know what needs to be done to get back on track. But for now, my brain needs rest and it needs to get back to fun stuff like stitching and annoying my JB.
I would be completely remiss if I did not end this post with the most sincere thank you of my like. Your constant love and support and encouragement and tips and noodges and help have been positively invaluable to me. I. Am. Just. Not. Worthy. Of. You.
Time for some stitching, I think. It is just as grey and rainy and gloomy as it can be outside today, so I am looking forward to some cozy time with Hoity Toity and the Flosstubes!
Happy, happy, GO DAY, Dearies! Onward!
Nov 20, 2019
NOPE
Came off treatment at111.6 today, Dearies.
That's 245.5 pounds.
We'll see what happens tomorrow.
That's 245.5 pounds.
We'll see what happens tomorrow.
DOING MATH IN MY HEAD
It's D Day, Dearies. My off weight after treatment will be the one that I take to my appointment with Dr. Goggins tomorrow. Mercifully, they use your post-treatment weight for measure and not your day-of weight. (Dialysis patients typically gain fluid weight in between treatments, and it can be as much as five to ten pounds in some cases!)
Another thing to consider is the rinse back, which is the weight of the fluid and last little bit of blood that they put back in as you come off the machine.
Oh....and we do all of this in kilograms, which are the equivalent of 2.2 pounds.
My on weight is113kg/248.6 pounds.
Minus treatment will hopefully be 3kg/6.6 pounds.
Plus rinse back of .4kg/.88 pounds
Should equal an off weight of 110.4kg/242.88 pounds
Pray my blood pressure holds out, Dearies. If it crashes, they will have to push fluid back in, and that will mean added weight.
Oey with the numbers already!!
Thank you for indulging me these last many weeks. I promise that I will just shut up about it already and will convert my every waking moment/obsessions to something other than weight loss, Dr Goggins, blood pressure, and dialysis treatments. But...in my defense...this hasn't been a vanity exercise or the desire to fit into smaller pants. This is me wanting to live and doing everything I can to do so.
Plus, as soon as I get this new kidney we are going to have the mother of all stitchy retreats/celebration party/extravaganzas here in Hoosierville, and then I'm going to make it my business to travel from place to place and terrorize LNS's and stitchers everywhere!
OK...time to get under my blanket and watch the Flosstube. I am weeks behind and miss peeking into everybody's virtual windows!
God Bless and keep every single one of your dear hearts for putting up with me!
Another thing to consider is the rinse back, which is the weight of the fluid and last little bit of blood that they put back in as you come off the machine.
Oh....and we do all of this in kilograms, which are the equivalent of 2.2 pounds.
My on weight is113kg/248.6 pounds.
Minus treatment will hopefully be 3kg/6.6 pounds.
Plus rinse back of .4kg/.88 pounds
Should equal an off weight of 110.4kg/242.88 pounds
Pray my blood pressure holds out, Dearies. If it crashes, they will have to push fluid back in, and that will mean added weight.
Oey with the numbers already!!
Thank you for indulging me these last many weeks. I promise that I will just shut up about it already and will convert my every waking moment/obsessions to something other than weight loss, Dr Goggins, blood pressure, and dialysis treatments. But...in my defense...this hasn't been a vanity exercise or the desire to fit into smaller pants. This is me wanting to live and doing everything I can to do so.
Plus, as soon as I get this new kidney we are going to have the mother of all stitchy retreats/celebration party/extravaganzas here in Hoosierville, and then I'm going to make it my business to travel from place to place and terrorize LNS's and stitchers everywhere!
OK...time to get under my blanket and watch the Flosstube. I am weeks behind and miss peeking into everybody's virtual windows!
God Bless and keep every single one of your dear hearts for putting up with me!
Nov 19, 2019
BLURRY TUESDAY
I'm here, but decidedly...blurry. I'm not sure if it's a d-chair hangover, sleepiness, or the gloomy weather, but my brain feels a bit elsewhere at the moment. The second cup of damn good is almost complete, and methinks there might be the necessity of a third today. Fortunately, my schedule is full of a whole lotta nothing, so life will take me where it will...
Hoity Toity continues to delight:
And a new candle/crackpot Spinster fireplace sets the tone. This one is cinnamon...
(That's not a shrine, by the way. The photo needed a new place to live, and I like being able to see it from the Happy Chair. So no need to chastise me, Betty, for worshipping a dog.)
It would appear that our Tuesday is off and running with me dragging behind it, Dearies. What's on your Tuesday agenda? Come tell me all about it!
Hoity Toity continues to delight:
And a new candle/crackpot Spinster fireplace sets the tone. This one is cinnamon...
It would appear that our Tuesday is off and running with me dragging behind it, Dearies. What's on your Tuesday agenda? Come tell me all about it!
Nov 18, 2019
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