My mom can't come to the blog right now. She's sitting in her office waiting for the plumber to get here, and based upon the conversation I heard her having with my Aunt Chrissy last night, she is all a-twitter with anticipation that she's going to see his heiney.
Apparently, plumbers are known for short pants and exposed derrieres, since all Mo-ther could talk about was the fact that a M-A-N was going to be in the house for the first time in eleventy-senven years and that if the gods were good she would get to ogle his bottom.
My Aunt Chrissy pointed out that the plumber would probably be a guy called Matt and that he would probably be about nine years old and definitely not have a propensity for short pants and an exposed derriere, but evidently, Mo-ther is still hoping.
(Seriously, though, Mo-ther and Aunt Chrissy are getting themselves new kitchen faucets today, so the old lady spent the better part of the morning scrubbing and washing and spritzing things so that the nine year old plumber might marvel at her homekeeping skills.)
(But can I just point out that she's presently attired in pajama bottoms, a Hanes old man white t-shirt and a v-neck sweater that should have been sent to the rag bin AGES ago? Throw in the Grandma Slippers, and she's sporting quite the ensemble for plumber seduction, I must say.)
Stitching time was rather limited last evening since I felt the need to cuddle in Mo-ther's lap and stare deeply into her eyes. I have to do this every now and then so that she'll feel useful and loved. Trust me when I tell you that a few minutes of faking it goes a long way toward keeping her quiet. If I mind my own business and leave her alone for too long, I hear her on the phone whining to Aunt Chrissy about the fact that I'm cold and aloof. So ten minutes of "Oh, how I love you, Mommie Dearest" should see me through to the holidays.
I hope that you are warm and safe and dry and you're getting your very own version of plumber's heiney today. Please know that until we meet again I remain your loyal and devoted friend.
With love from your pal,