Mar 1, 2012

WHOOPSIE, OR WHY AUNT CHRISSY IS GOING TO HAVE TO FIND A SPINSTERSITTER TO LOOK AFTER ME

I slept funny.

You know what happens when you sleep funny? You wake up with a sore/stiff neck. So sore and stiff, as a matter of fact, that you can't turn your head in any one direction without screeching in pain.

So I fixed it.

I have a big basket 'o First Aid in the bathroom cabinet, and after fishing around in there for a few minutes I came up with some IcyHot and a thing called a Bed Buddy. The former is well known to anybody who has ever slathered themselves up into a mentholated fog after a tough workout. The latter is something that I got at the Bed Bath and Freakin Beyond for $9.99 on clearance. (It's a heat/cold thing that you can put into either the microwave or the freezer. You know...like a compress.)

Both, alas, are NOT to be used together, especially when you mis-read that label on the Bed Buddy that specifically tells you NOT to heat the damn thing up to "skin scorching" levels and then plop it smack dab on top of mentholated cream.

My neck feels great.

The third degree burns on all of the skin surrounding said neck? Not so much. (*)

This, and many many other incidents like this is why Aunt Chrissy will be furiously flipping through the Yellow Pages later today looking for an agency that caters to people who are just too stupid to be left to their own devices.

Either that, or she's going to take me to a day care center and tell them not to let me near anything breakable and/or anyONE hurtable.

But let's move on to some stitching, shall we?

This whole FIFTEEN MINUTE thing is still working well for me after a whopping two days. Yesterday I sat down in front of the Maggie canvas and before I knew it had stitched this:I'm diverging a little bit from Miss Ruth's stitch guide (because I suddenly got cocky and decided to unclip my stitchy wings), but Miss Ruth won't mind. She's cool that way. I still have lots of beads and doo dads to add, but at least I've got a pretty good idea of how things are starting to look. I do, though, want to change the colors of that border. IMHO, it's just too darn dark. Methinks I might try to completely lose my mind and do a multi-colored border with different stitches in it.

(Oh look. She stitches one darn flower and gets all jiggy with it like she knows what she's doing.)

Aunt Chrissy and I are off to the grocery store tonight. It's Thursday, so that means we'll take ourselves to the Martin's and wander the aisles aimlessly looking for the magic meal to jump into our carts. I still can't figure out what I'm hungry for, so until I do, it looks like I'll stick with meatloaf. And roasted brussel sprouts. You gotta' have the brussel sprouts.

Stewey sends his love and regrets that he has been unable to blog lately. He promises to be back soon and to fill you in on all of the crazy shenanigans over here in Hoosierville. In the meantime, please stay warm and safe and dry and know that we both love your visits with us! Thank you for making this such a lovely way to start the day! Woo Hoo!

*(And before I get a ga-zillion emails from all of you health professionals out there telling me that I need to go to the emergency room to have the third degree burns treated by a trained professional....please know that I exaggerate for effect. I'm fine. Really. I am. But saying "Gee, that Bed Buddy combined with the IcyHot cream turned my neck bright red and burnt it a little bit just doesn't have the same effect now, does it?)

(Hyperbole, people. It's how I roll.)

19 comments:

  1. It's such a pretty piece. If you frame it an option would be to let it "float" surrounded by mats and a frame rather than create a set border with thread. Does the background stitch lend itself to that idea? Glad to hear part of your story was "faux" and that you're feeling better.

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  2. You're a hoot...maybe I will come and take care of you....on second thought, it might cramp my stitiching time!!lol

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  3. Love the canvas the colors are so pretty.

    I was at the grocery last night and they had those new kraft toss up things by the shredded cheese section. Kinda like shake and bake but with cheese. It all comes together in the package, you just throw in the meat and shake it. I've heard its great, ill test it on the husband.

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  4. Love this piece! It is so cheery and the colors would look great in my living room. I am sure whatever you decide to do with the boarder will look great I will be waiting expectantly for it to ship in the mail. I know dream on... We are on a Wildtree kick around here. It is a company that has a lot of healthy food products low in salt ect. Working on keeping blood pressure down and a crappy cholesterol problem. My daughter is now selling it so of coarse I am buying. Made spinach,feta cheese stuffed chicken breast last night seasoned with the Wildtree Smoked Mozzarella seasoning. Yumm. Have a great shopping trip!

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  5. Ouch on the burn...I did that once....well, actually my mom did it for me. Put a product called HEAT on my knee and then wrapped it with a flannel bandage. It`s not so bad once the skin grows back, honest!

    Love the stitching. I agree about the border, it is too dark.Maybe a lighter green?

    Kisses to Stewey and Bosco....

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  6. I've been thinking about your 15 minute inspiration! I like it so much I'm going to apply it to
    -stitching,
    -books,
    -movies,
    -tv shows,
    -visiting relations,
    -and a few other things I can think of not necessarily suitable for a G audience!
    Thanks again Spinster Stitcher for a great idea!
    Colleen in Canada

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  7. Glad you were able to get the stifness out of your neck. Love the colors in your canvas.

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  8. I agree the border is a tad dark - let's see what you do with it! Glad your neck still works. You know, swiss steak with fried potatoes sounds pretty good for the weekend snacking.

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  9. Honey You are Funny!!!Reading you makes me want to drop my hook and pick up a needle..I start my day with "ya-all (and coffee) and laugh all day.. Makes my "others" wonder what in heck I am thinking about and I won't tell them.. They wouldn't get it anyway... Yes the border is a leetle darkish.. enjoy your mentholated day! Hugs from Tuscaloosa, Alabama

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  10. Sure hope you're feeling better and back to your old self again! I hate waking up with a stiff neck and back. Your Melissa piece looks lovely (yeah, I read the first post and then this one). And don't feel bad, we all have our "boob" moments in life. HUGS from central Florida

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  11. Now does your stiff neck feel better or did the third degree burns just take your mind off that pain? Think about it. I agree the border does look a little too dark for the other bright colors, they look great.

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  12. Never, never leave us Coni! Your tales are wonderfully funny and so true. I'm cringing my neck and giggling at the same time.
    The stitching is coming along very nicely. I agree with your verdict about the border and look forward to your fix.
    BTW - I'm a retiree and have the time to do some babysitting....hint hint (!). Currently I have 3 WIPs in progress, so that should be good for a month or so?!

    Nina

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  13. Keep up the hyperbole,I love your blog.
    I also love how your stitching is coming on,it looks beautiful.

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  14. Thanks for always making me laugh . I am always doing something that makes my family crazy.....it's my job I tell them......I don't want them to get bored with me. Love the stitching....and tell Stewey that Scully is missing his doggy post.......Trudy

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  15. Check out the fuchsia one in the 3rd row on the right...

    http://www.mentalfloss.com/store/T-Shirts/

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  16. LOL...all I can say is that I'm glad I ain't stupid by myself. XP (YAY! Another lil yellow school bus window licker!) Feel better...either way. ;)

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  17. I love the way you write, hyperbole and all...and gosh, that sounds like something I would do. Your flowers are coming along nicely! Have a good weekend, Coni - enjoy the meatloaf :o)

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  18. I agree with poster above me, I love the way you write your blog posts as well. You have a way of composing them that sounds like having coffee and talking with a (very funny) friend. Am sorry about the heat and menthol product issue - OUCH!

    Your project is BEAUTIFUL, I agree that the border looks very dark - a multi-color border (while maddening) would really be more in keeping with the other aspects of the piece. Doesn't that sound like I know what I'm doing? (and I don't)

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  19. We're rolling with you Coni. CJ in OK ;-)

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