Dec 9, 2010

OEY


My mom can't come to the blog right now. She's in her closet with a plastic tiara perched atop her head, dancing about hollering "They LIKE me! They really really LIKE me!" I fear that extreme measures will need to be taken, or not one damn thing will be done around here, because Her Royal Highness won't be able to fit that massive ego of hers through any existing doorways. Do you people see what I have to contend with when you write such lovely things about my whacky nutjob of a mo-ther? Do you know how hard it is for me to bring her back down to earth after she's read comments that tell her she's funny and wonderful and responsible for the earth turning on its axis every other day?


I'm begging you. Please...in the name of all that is holy....DON'T ENCOURAGE HER!


Believe me when I tell you that she gets all the validation she needs around here and that telling her that she's responsible for any part of your day going well is not a good idea. This only makes her want to please you further and we all know that nothing good can come of that. So next time she ruminates on the meaning of life or questions her pitiful little place in the world...just let it go. You must trust me about this. We will all be much better off in the long run if the woman I live with doesn't get too cocky.


Onward. Shall we?


The honeymoon is nearing an end with Frank. I'm assuming that the squiggles around his moustache and beard are the source of the problem, since Mom sat in the Happy Chair for about four hours last night trying to figger it out. She did manage to stitch Frank's hands and face in a way that I think looks pretty good, but those squiggles has her in sixes and sevens. The last thing she did before tucking me in to bed for the night was to go upstairs to get a #32 braid that she remembered she had from another project. I think she's going to try to squiggle that back and forth around the grey velvet and call it a day. Then, all that's left is the fur and we'll have ourselves one very funky Frank Santa.


That's the Thursday report from Chex Spinster. On behalf of my silly mo-ther, please allow me to thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your swell comments on the last post, but icks-nay on the comments-ay, right?


Don't do anything I would do today. (This, of course, will mean that your draperies will remain clean and pressed, and that you won't feel compelled to torture a poor unsuspecting spinster into giving you as many cookies as your little tummy can hold.)


With much love from your pal,

Stewey


12 comments:

  1. Now then Stewey, me thinks you might be just the tiniest bit jealous of all the attention Mo-ther is getting. You know she deserves it. But we all love you to, so don't you fret.

    Hey Conni, as I'm not really a needlepointer, I hope you don't mind me chipping in on the bell question. A real jingle bell sounds great but I don't think that it will hang the way you want it to (unless you can find a half round one). I think satin stitch with a metallic thread over lots of padding stitches so it almost dome shaped.

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  2. O.K. your Mom deserves all the credit she can get that pattern really is a stinker, if we say very lovely thing about you will it be o.k.? I think you have lovely eyes and a super duper wonderful smile, and I bet you keep mom's feet warm when needed.
    Cookies, I long for a cookie you lucky little sweetheart.
    Stay off the drapes there is nothing worse than to have to clean drapes.
    Merry Christmas to you, I hope Santa brings you lots and lots of cookies, no wait you are suppose to put cookies out for Santa.
    Merry Christmas.

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  3. Now, now Stewey. Your poor Mommy deserves only the very best. After she has you right?

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  4. suggestions on the squiggles: 1) memory thread laid and couched or 2) stem type stitch in gra velvet then go backand wrap 9without going thru the canvas threads, just over and under the velvet stem stitch) with a kreink or braid or whatever to make it squiggle along.

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  5. Hello Darling Stewey!

    I would have turned those hands into mittens and avoided the whole fingers issues, but that is just me.

    Your mom is tops in my book as she makes me laugh, but you're the one that classes up the joint.

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  6. Gosh I didn't think I would like the look of the outlining on his hands but it DOES look better! You have a much better eye than I do! God Bless. Sandi Jo in KC

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  7. Stewey Stewey ....behave yourself. Just think, you could be living in a boring home. Instead, you have a fun house. Now Coni, I would not presume to even give my opinion on Frank because I know not a thing about needlpoint...but I like him...

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  8. Hi Conni. I have been lusting after the pattern for a piece you did in 2009. I believe it is a blackbird design. It is a black container with some strawberries and flowers...? I was in a Needlework store today describing it to them..but alas no luck. I'd appreciate any info. from you about it. Thanks!! Melody
    mmheck@yahoo.com

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  9. I love Mom and Stewy. I have an Iggy that is Stewy's twin separated at birth. It takes a brave woman to raise a dog like that.

    Please don't change and stay just the way you are - Stewy too.

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  10. Now Stewy, be nice to your Mo-ther. She is a lovely person, the kind that makes the world a better place. Hugs, Viv

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  11. Now Stewey, all that fussing and futzing over the stitching is part of what makes your mo-ther such a wonder to watch. She makes eye candy for stitchers. If inflating the ego is what it takes to keep her at it, then that's what needs to be done.

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  12. Hello Stewey ! I love your Mom's Frank - it is way cool ! you are a pretty handsome dude yourself! Stay out of trouble this weekend or Santa may not come to call. Cheers! mel

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