Oct 5, 2010

MOEY CHAN DIZE ING

Thanks for your confirmation that I am, in fact, a brilliant moeychandizer. (You know...merchandising? That thing that Target does to get you to put the beef jerkey and hand sanitizer in your cart while you're waiting for the check out lady to get the heck done with the guy in front of you who can't be bothered to pull his pants up so that you don't have to see his heiney in all its glory?)

I think life is simply a matter of merchandising. You take what you have and slap something shiny on it and suddenly it looks much better to the world. You stack things just so...you fold things just right....you polish and smooth and flatten and suck in and all is well.

Crappy furniture that the dog pees on? Put a vase or two on a shelf and you're freakin Pottery Barn. Bangs that seemed like a good idea at the time? Gel those suckers to within an inch of their very lives, and you're suddenly very hip and retro. (Let's face it, kids. NOBODY can rock the 80's bangs like I can). You weigh as much as a small building and have enough facial hair to grow your own wiglet? Slap on some mascara and...voila! You're an internationally famous uber super model.

(Oh wait. That last one is something that I do in order to convince myself that one must really go outside every now and then to face one's public and one mustn't do so with the idea that a burka really would be a better autumnal fashion decision than one's current wardrobe of eighteen year old sweatpants.)

But I regress...

Since the damn United States Postal Service hasn't yet employed the use of the USS Enterprise for its transporting of needlework orders, I had to pull something out of my stash for last night's stitching. Low and beehives, I found this Blackbird Designs chart that I had started forever ago:
Isn't it swell? When I started this, I decided to use only one ply. But after further consideration, I decided to beef it up a bit, and I'm going to go with two ply for the whole entire thing. (Yes, I'll have to frog and then re-stitch "heaven".) The linen is a very nice piece of 36 ct. "Days Gone By" from Silkweavers.

As you might remember, I have a real thing for the British artist Sam Toft. I have several pieces and hope someday to devote and entire room to them. Aunt Chrissy has gifted me with most of my collection, and on Friday she added two more:


I just can't enough of these, I tell ya. I have one of the biggest pieces hanging in such a way that it's the first thing that I see each day, and I can't tell you how much I get a kick out of Mr. Mustard and Co. And how could I NOT love Doris, the little Jack Russell terrier? (I tired calling Stewey by that name, but he wasn't too thrilled about it and decided to voice his displeasure by watering the drapes.) Damn dog.

8 comments:

  1. Hmm.... I think I used to see those two ladies when I would take walks along the west bank of the Thames. What cool art!

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  2. Those are two very interesting pieces of art.

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  3. Love the Sam Toft! Checked the prices though...ouch! You have a very generous sister!

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  4. Oh, you hit on one of my pet peeves - the US Postal (Non) Service. And not just in regards to needlework stash, but books, too. Can postal workers read? I mean about the "Do Not Bend' written on a package that is then stuffed into a tiny hole called a mail box that has been supplied to us by the developer and for which USPS has a key. The mail already took almost twice as long to arrive as it was supposed to, and now it is crunched, folded, ripped, half open, and a bent mess! We had one mailman who did not like to get out of his postal truck to deliver packages to the door. If he had to, he'd read you the riot act and threaten not to deliver your mail. Arrgh!!

    Do you think I could borrow Stewey to pee on their truck the next time I get a 'mess' delivered to me rather than the nice perfect chart or book what was originally mailed? Ok, I don't really want to traumatized poor Stewey. Besides, he is just too dignified to stoop to this behavior with just anyone.

    I like the pictures Aunt Chrissy gave you!

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  5. Okay I have searched high and low(sober and tipsy) for the Blackbird chart you are stitching and have had no luck finding it. Could you please(pretty please with capers on it)tell me what the name of it is?
    Thanks and give the boss a hug for me.
    Connie
    (Omaha..that's in Nebraska...and in the USA!)

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  6. Okay I have searched high and low(sober and tipsy) for the Blackbird chart you are stitching and have had no luck finding it. Could you please(pretty please with capers on it)tell me what the name of it is?
    Thanks and give the boss a hug for me.
    Connie
    (Omaha..that's in Nebraska...and in the USA!)

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  7. What IS that Blackbird Design because I don't find it in my stash?! Hmmm, an oversight on my part but can't locate the chart either on Hoffman.

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  8. ...facial hair for a wiglet and the 80's bangs - unfortunately I've done both...LOL YOu really crack me up! Once again reading your posts (as it's been a few days and I had a few to catch up) resulted in laugh-out-loud moments - thanks for that!! Love your new BBD start. Hope your house is spick'n'span...and that you have a good case of stitching butt! I know I like me some stitch-butt time!

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