Apr 12, 2010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AUNT CHRISSY!

My favorite Aunt Chrissy story takes place on Eater Sunday 1975.....

Scene: A bustling kitchen in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. A mother scurries about, getting Easter dinner ready. She glances to her left and sees her youngest daughter standing in the doorway.

Mother: Chrissy, I told you that I'm really busy right now and need to get this dinner ready. Can you go play with your Barbies for a few minutes, sweetheart?

Chrissy: Sure, Mommy. But I have so many things to tell you that I thought I would stand here and talk to you while you cook. That way I can fulfill my need to be talking every waking moment of the day and you get to spend some quality time with me.

Mother: Why don't you go wait for Grandma and Uncle Connie to get here?

The little girl walks to the front closet, gets her little green velvet coat, and heads out to the front porch. She sits on the cold hard cement and thinks about what a bust this holiday has been for her. Yesterday, she and her brilliant and gorgeous older sister Constance were playing nuns. This was an activity that they both loved, and two white terry cloth bath towels were always put into use as a simple yet effective head-covering.

Yesterday, though, something seemed off. Constance was out of sorts and was bossier than usual. "Nuns don't have curly hair", she grumbled. "We need to get rid of those stupid curls sticking out of your head thingie."

"OK", the little girl said as she trotted off to get the big scissors. "Will you cut it for me, Coni Jo? I'm only four and not allowed to use the big scissors."

The older sister grinned as she maniacally snipped and snipped all of the gorgeous light brown curls away from her little sister's face.

"There", said Constance. "Now you look like a real nun."

As she reflected on the ensuing spanking that both she and her sister received, the little girl wondered why it was such a big deal that she would have to go to Easter Sunday Church services with her hat on. Didn't everybody wear a hat for Easter?

Later that afternoon, the mother stopped the dinner preparations to call out to the little girl.

Mother: Chrissy? Where are you, honey? Come here and try a pickled beet for me to see if I've got them right. Chrissy?

Constance: She's outside.

Mother: WHAT!!! WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING OUTSIDE?!


Constance: You told her to go wait for Grandma.

Mother: Oh for crying out loud! THEY'RE DRIVING IN FROM LIMA AND WON'T BE HERE FOR FOUR HOURS! IT'S TWENTY TWO DEGREES OUT THERE! GO GET YOUR LITTLE SISTER AND TELL HER TO GET IN HERE!!

Constance: OK.

Sadly, Constance is distracted by the latest Nancy Drew mystery that was in her Easter basket that morning. She heads into the den and buries her nose in the book...completely forgetting about her tiny little sister standing alone outside on the front porch.

Later that afternoon....

The front door opens and several voices are heard.

Grandma: Sig?! Are you home? What the hell is Chrissy doing standing out on the front porch?! We pulled up and she said that she had been out there all day waiting for us! Her little nose is running and she's frozen solid! What the heck are you people doing in here?

The relatives all kiss and hug hello in stony silence as the little girl heads upstairs for a hot bath. As she's hanging up her coat, she glances at the curls hidden in the wastebasket and decides that Christmas is definitely her favorite holiday.

THE END


P.S. Here's a few things you should know about Aunt Chrissy:

1. Yes, the hair story is completely true. When she was little she had positively gorgeous light brown curly ringlets that covered her head. I cut them off. (What can I say? I had a head like a bowling ball and was evil.)

2. My sister talked from the minute she woke up until the minute she passed out in her little bed. Some nights, she would tip-toe to the side of Mom and Dad's bed and poke Mom awake because she had more to say or had "forgetted to tell you something."

3. She was a very good little girl and usually did exactly what she was told, so the story above is as true and accurate as I can remember it. We believe that she had been out on that porch for at least three hours, because when Grandma and Uncle Connie finally got there they said she was really really shivering and her lips were a bit blue.

4. My sister isn't just in my life...she is my life. (Sorry, that's a line from Tony Soprano, but it's just too damn apropos not to use it here.) She is funny and kind and strong and very very brave. She takes care of me, tolerates my silly little dog, and feeds all of the birds, squirrels and ducks faithfully and with great care. She is the rock and the leader of our little family, and there are times when I really wonder what I did to be given such a gift of this particular sister. I love her, need her, and care about her more than anything or anyone I've ever known, and I cannot and will not live my life without her in it.

So there you have it. Aunt Chrissy turns 39 today and I couldn't be happier about it.

38 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! I hope that this is the happiest one yet!

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  2. What a great story!
    Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy!!!
    And many, many more.
    Marilyn

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  3. Happy Birthday, Aunt Chrissy. It is obvious that you are a very special person and that you are loved very, very, very much. Having a wonderful sister is a blessing.

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  4. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! You both are blessed to have each other!!

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  5. I always wanted a sister. You are both so fortunate. Happy Birthday, Aunt Chrissy!

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  6. HAppy Birthday Aunt Chrissy - all families need an Aunt Chrissy!

    PS. My little brother got so fed up with people telling him how beautiful his curls were, he went up the back of the garden and cut them off himself - no help needed from big sister!

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  7. Happy Birthday, Aunt Chrissy! I hope you have a wonderful day!

    Anne

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  8. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! You are so lucky to have each other.

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  9. HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUNT CHRISSY!

    And Coni - I did a similar thing to my sister's beautiful blonde locks at a similar age. She's just about forgiven me...

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  10. I loved your story. You are blest to have each other. Thanks for telling us.

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  11. HAPPY BIRTHDAY Aunt Chrissy!!

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  12. Your kind best wishes brought a tear to my eye. Dear Stewey is my very favorite dog evah! Thank you to you, Chrissy, Stewey, and Boscoe. May Chrissy have a very special birthday.

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  13. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! I hope you have a wonderful day - we look forward to Coni telling us all about it later!

    Love from Jackie in UK x

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  14. Happy Birthday, Aunt Chrissy!

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  15. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy!!!! I couldn't be without my Big Sis ever and as Karen said above, having a wonderful sister is truly a blessing for which I am thankful!!! Have a great day both of you!!!!

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  16. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! I wish I had a sister like you. Coni, a dear friend of mine tells a story about her son that is a lot like yours. He got into some trouble and was told to sit on the porch and think about it. He did. The grown ups forgot he was there and continued with the get together they were all having. Poor Dave spent the better part of 7 hours out there until someone noticed him gone. But it was summer, so at least he didn't turn blue.

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  17. More Happy Birthday wishes for Aunt Chrissy! We little sisters have got to stick together!

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  18. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy!

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  19. Happy birthday to Aunt Chrissy!
    My little sister is also my life! as a matter of fact..I am moving back to her house in August. Her and her hubby just put in new windows and walls in the 2 rooms in the basement...and with my own bathroom too! I wouldn't know what to do without her...so I know exactly how you feel!
    Enjoy each other forever! ((HUGS)))

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  20. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy!! Aunt Chrissy- Be careful...don't get too close to her while she's stitching...there are scissors involved and I fear for your head of hair!

    As usual, this is a hilarious post! and Very creative!

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  21. What a cute story...I can imagine how angry your mother must of been about the "haircut". Such nice words for your sister...I think she is pretty lucky too.

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  22. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy and a special hello to Bosco - such a little cutie.

    Coni,
    I know that you spent hours in the kitchen baking a delicious cake for your sister and the pups. My sister also reminds me of all the evil things that I did to her when we were kids.

    Enjoy the day.

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  23. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! I am so lucky because my sister is my best friend and also my stitching companion! She's a great stitch stash enabler!

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  24. Happy B'day, Aunt Chrissy! Just to make you feel a little better, I put a bowl on my younger sister's head and cut around it back in the day. She still hasn't forgiven me. You are so lucky to have each other for sisters and friends.

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  25. Aunt Chrissy is awesome and I dont even know her~~~ I am SO glad she is there to keep you in line though....Happiest of Birthdays A.C.~~~

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  26. Sounds like you hit the sister lottery with Chrissy. And I totally get what you're saying, because I feel the same way about my three sisters (and one brother).

    Chrissy, I know you're reading these comments, so I'm talking to you now. Enjoy your birthday, and enjoy the time you spend with your sister! And if you can find the time to start a blog of your own, we'd love to see your stitching and hear from you and Bosco, too!

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  27. Happy Birthday, Chrissy! next year is one of the big ones!

    Pittsburgh???????????????????????
    where in Pittsburgh????????

    i grew up in the suburbs on the north/north west side of the city!!!!!

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  28. Happy Birthday Chrissy!!!!

    Can I be adopted????
    I need a sister who cares.
    Lovely story - hugs to you both

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  29. Happy Birrrrrthday, Annnnnt Chrrisssssyyyyy, Happy Birthday to youuuuuuuuuuu!

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  30. When I started to read your story, I thought I would tell you about the day my younger brother cut my fringe all wonky, just before the photographer turned up! Can't remember if it was his idea or mine nor why but I have the pictures to prove it :-)

    However, when I read point 4 my eyes started to leak, and I remembered that I wanted a sister so badly that I never fully forgave my youngest brother for being a boy (3 brothers, no sisters).

    Happy Birthday, Aunt Chrissy.

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  31. Happy happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy! I hope it was filled with cream-filled things and double layers of goodness!!! Us 39'ers must hang together. :-)))

    Big hugs!

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  32. Hope you had a wonderful day Aunt Chrissy!!Did Stewey give you a nice gift??
    Love Karen in Australia

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  33. Happy Birthday to Aunt Chrissy! Thanks for the story and for setting the record straight as to what was factual and what was embellished! Loved it!

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  34. I still wish I had a sister...
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUNT CRISSY!!!!

    May you have many, many more :)

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  35. Happy Birthday Aunt Chrissy!

    It sounds like the two of you were close even as children. That is very special and it is good that you treasure the relationship.

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