Aug 19, 2009

THE RACOON ATE MY HOMEWORK

Further evidence that my life seems to be one big cosmic joke...

Aunt Chrissy came over for moral support during the cleaning of the Happy Chair yesterday. (It came out PERFECTLY! by the way, and now looks like a brand-new seventeen-year old piece of furniture.) As payment for her services, I asked her to stay for dinner and some stitching.

Just as we were settling in, my little puppy tot nephew Bosco started going nutso over something in the back yard, so I kind of half-assed looked outside and said "Oh, he's just barking at the deer in the field".

So Aunt Chrissy let him outside on his lead (he doesn't stay in the yard the way Stewey does), and after a few minutes she yells "RACCOON!" "BIG RACCOON!" and dashes outside to pull the now fully-alert Bosco out of the yard and onto the patio. He had been standing at full-on fight mode and was in a staring contest with a raccoon.

Considering it was still broad daylight out there, something in the back of my brain said "Hmmm. That's strange. I think those are only supposed to come out at night" and I quickly realized that the poor thing was sick. Or caught in the fence that runs along the back of the property. Either way...NOT a good situation for Nature Girl here and her little sister.

I called the Animal Control Department, who told me to call the Mishawaka Police Department, who told me to call the Humane Society. Within minutes, a lovely man (in a uniform and with a badge and everything, hubba hubba) showed up with a stick and a cage. He had to climb the fence into the field, but he managed to find the little critter, use the stick thingie, and put him in the cage without incident.

Apparently, the raccoon was suffering from distemper, which meant that it was completely disoriented and neurologically impaired. When I asked the officer if he was going to take the little guy to a farm in Upstate New York (because that's where all sick animals go), he looked at me like I was completely nuts and then proceeded to explain to Aunt Chrissy (clearly the rational adult) that because it was suffering and could injure itself, another animal, or a human it would likely be put down.

I thought about that poor raccoon all night long and felt like a schmuck for hitting my proverbial panic button. As I was wringing my hands raw, Stewey jumped up into my lap, looked deeply into my eyes and told me that if I didn't snap out of it, he was going to send me to a farm in Upstate New York.

Here's the lousy progress on "Needlework Shop":

19 comments:

  1. Awwwwww, poor sick Rocky the racoon. :(

    I have had them come right up to my back door. Though never in the daytime. If they did we would have to see how quick they could run cause there is no way that Rory would begin to listen if he saw or even smeeled something to chase!

    I'm glad to hear that the Happy Chair is as good as new.

    ReplyDelete
  2. What a soap opera your life is, Coni! Good thing you have your newly cleaned Happy Chair to retreat to - Congrats on that, by the way.... I really love how many animals you have around you - makes me want to live next door to you! But even here in downtown Healdsburg we get raccoons (not to mention coyotes yipping in the distance). Katie treed one one night in the fig tree right outside my bedroom. Yikes, I don't know who was more excited - me, Katie or the raccoon!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Poor racoon! I think it was good that you called, even though poor Rocky will be put down. Who knows how much he would have suffered, being ill and all? Sad, but a fact of life. I'm glad your chair turned out.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Once again, you have given me my daily chuckle. :)

    You did the correct thing by calling for help with the animal, what if he bit Stewey or Bosco!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi, I live in Upstate NY and if you ever get exported from Mishawaka, you can come live with me. I have a Happy couch and live with a plethora of wildlife. You'll fit right in...LOL!

    Sorry about your racoon but you did the right thing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thank goodness you recognized that the racoon should not be out in daylight. Distemper is contagious and not a disease you want spread around.
    We live on a hobby farm and our JRTs would go on their morning forays into the woods each day. One day, our neutered male was gone a good while; soon, we could hear him barking. My husband found him having a standoff with a BIG snapping turtle. Thankfully, Mr. Snappy was inside his shell, but poor Copper could have lost his little nose....Those JRTs will take on a badger; they're such tough little rascals.
    Great news about your chair -- enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.

    ReplyDelete
  7. hubba hubba indeed! I love a man in uniform.....

    Glad to hear your happy chair has been returned to its former glory - enjoy!

    ReplyDelete
  8. You really are in the middle of Wild Kingdom! Poor raccoon. I've had raccoons in my house twice (cat door issue), but just long enough to eat cat food, play in the cat water and leave little raccoon handprints. Very exciting.

    Also, so happy the happy chair is all better.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm glad Stewey was able to talk you off the ledge. Poor little raccoon... but you did the right thing.

    Love the progress on your WIP!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I saw a racoon one afternoon in Central Park! Talk about disorientation! He too was obviously ill and I mentioned it to a policeman on 57th Street, but I think he thought I was the one who was deranged.
    Glad your Happy Chair is like new again...enjoy many hours in it!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I spent the last 2 days reading all your entries. Thank you for all the laughs. Also, you are a bad, enabling woman. I can't tell you how many of your stitchy pieces I drooled over and determined that I must have.

    Hugs and kisses to Stewey.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Um...given your love for nature...have you ever thought of a home in mid-town Manhattan? :-) That's my attempt at humor. I actually think you did the dear little racoon a favor if he/she was suffering.
    Glad the happy chair is back.
    Blessings,
    Julie

    ReplyDelete
  13. I enjoy finding your blog entries in the morning when I wake up - your unique twist on life makes a great start to the day.
    I'm glad that your happy chair is restored to former glory - now you can settle in and continue to produce such lovely works of Art.
    As for Rocky - although it's such an 'awwwwwwww' moment, you DID do the right thing. (I won't go on about the wildlife around here - for fear of repercussive conniptions!)
    By the way, did you get a photo of the lovely man in a uniform and all?? lol

    ReplyDelete
  14. I have been reading your blog for some time, and I find it incredibly entertaining. You have a gift for humor and writing (and stitching...I enjoy the stitching too). I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoy your blog and look forward to reading about the daily antics of yourself, Stewey, Aunt Chrissy, and Bosco. :)
    Have a great rest of the week!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Poor Coni! It could have been worse. I live in upstate NY and we found a bat in our yard a few years ago. You have made me realize I don't have a Happy Chair. Me thinks one should be on order for Christmas.

    ReplyDelete
  16. You could write a book!! Sorry about the racoon, but you have to thinjk of Stewey. You are making great progress on the Stitching Shop :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. Poor little racoon. We just need to remember that he's not suffering anymore.
    We have hedgehogs and rabbits on our yard every now and then. I just saw one rabbit when I was driving home late last night. I slowed down since she/he was bouncing right in front of the car for a while. Funny bunnies. :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. I love your commentaries!! Funny story even with the ending...but you probably SAVED your poochies life! for sure...so, happy stitching I look forward to reading more of your awesome stories! Faye

    ReplyDelete
  19. Coni, coni, Coni...you are such a delight! LOL!

    Nature is not always friendly is she; that poor raccoon was suffering terribly...so, you and Aunt Chrissy did the right thing!

    Glad your Happy Chair came out smelling like a faded rose...now you can sit-back, relax, and get busy on the LHN!! Get crackin' my lady!

    HAPPY STITCHIN'
    Terri
    dixiesamplardesigns

    ReplyDelete